mie mie's life

نص مبتدئ

2012-02-08T02:25:00.001-08:00

مشبعةٌ أنا بِـحبك
وأكرهُ (ألعنُ) النساء من حولك
عذراً فأنا عاشقة!
كلما اغرقتني بفيضك، زادت رغبتي بامتلاك
فهل تجرمني السماء والناس لِـحبك؟

والغيرة، تلك العاطفة ”البدائية“ غير المعلنة لاسبابٍ تعرفها وحدك..
ليست خوفاً منهن، ولا انتقاصا لحبك، انما هي شعور عشقي "ينكز" المحبين بين فينة وأخرى
فهل تعاقبني لشعورٍ طفيلٍ عابرٍ؟!

ختام الكلام: أحبك

Moushie

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You're His All, But...

2012-02-01T14:17:00.001-08:00

He calls
Non stop attention
Care, tender
Is welling to give you a home & the world, if you just ask...

He thinks about you day & night
Wants to give you all his love, if you only give a chance...

You know you are his closest
Closer to his soul
Run through his veins
Flow into his heart
Live in his mind

You are his pulse
His heart beat
His thoughts
Scent & sight!

He see you clearly in his future
He has a vision for both
He wants to be at his best for you
He wants to give you his all...

But... Your heart is not skipping a beat when you say his name
You don't gaze into emptiness and see his face
Cross your mind when he forces so...
He is not the reason you smile
Nor your dream
Not the crayons of your life
Nor the shades of colors
Not a shoulder you run too
Nor a ... Sigh!

Though that's a fact he knows... He is still fighting for you!

Would you stay with him for a perfect picture frame?!

Moushie

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What If

2012-01-06T17:50:00.001-08:00

What if...

You were in love with me,
Madly, deeply, true
And I was in love too

We had coffees, teas, cookies & sweets,,
Shared smiles and whipped in dreams,,
Kissed tears away, abandoned our sorrows from our ways,,
Smoothly talked & easily understood each's pain,,
Softly kissed, tenderly hugged & passionately loved,,
Flew to Cloud 9 everyday,,
Adored each other in all ways,,

What if
I was the one you always wanted, lived with me all that & beyond, but I was sadly engaged with another man, for better & worse, would you still love me the same?

I was only assuming I was with someone else... The "what if" kills doesn't it?!

Please... let's not live on assumptions when our reality is better than Wonderland...
A waste of time, a damage of brain & heart ache!

Let's never judge on "what if"
It's always wrong!

Love me today, later worry about the future & leave all the "what if" away!

Simply because the only thing that matters now is ... I love you ... Keep that in mind!

Moushie

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Don't Break It

2011-11-14T15:55:00.001-08:00

If I die today... I'll die with a smile! You fulfill my life with perfection, what more can I ask for?!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ShAmaOPK1h4&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Don't break it... That's what I'll ask for

Mie Mie

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I Keep It In ..

2011-11-12T08:00:00.001-08:00

There are many moments where I want to say ...

I feel it with all my senses, my heart beats harder, blood flows faster, my mind freezes everything and I shiver seconds before saying ...

I hesitate! The fear of pushing you away, may not be the right timing, the fear of a tomorrow without your presences. I am simply afraid of loosing you!

But there are those moments when you are so amazingly loving me, generously giving me wings to fly away from a gloomy lonely world, magically creating a universe for you & I ...

I can't help but wanting to say it loud, or whisper in you ears ... I love you

Yet I keep it inside ... Don't ask why

Mie Mie

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My Song ... To You

2011-11-08T04:42:00.000-08:00

Mie Mie

نشوة

2011-11-05T07:08:00.000-07:00

قد يكون حبا، لكنه اقرب الى الجنون

هل تؤمن بما وراء العقل؟ المنطق و الفلسفة؟

عجيبٌ امر القلب! فهو لا ينبض للقريب ، سهل المنال والموجود!

قلبي ينبض للمغامرة العاطفية المجنونة، الماجنة، المعقدة ... الاكثر من صعبة!

تلك ،، اعيش اقصى درجات الشقاء، اسجد شاكرة للحظة سعادة نادرة..

معك،، يتجلى المعنى الحقيقي للحياة!

اعشق وجودي في هوامش حياتك

في اللقاءات العابرة

التحيات المقتضبة

مرورك السريع ... هل تعلم ماذا يخلق مرورك اللحظي في كياني؟

لا اريد ان تعرف فيمتلئ راسك غرورا حدّ الانفجار، فيتحول جنوني بك الى استحقار.. لا شيء يقتل رغبتي بالرجل اكثر من غرور يقلبه الى مومس عجوز تفاخر بعدد الرجال وربما النساء اللواتي ضاجعتهم!

المهم...

هل تعلم انك تتربع على الرجال الذين شعرت معهم بانوثتي دون اللمس؟

وقوتي دون الاستفزاز؟

وعقلي دون التحدي؟

ونبض قلبي ؟؟؟ فانت تعطي كل شيءٍ لوناً ولحناً ومعناً لا اتذكر ان أحداً تمكن من بلوغه

أيها النابغة في علوم النساء

تباً لهن جميعا ، السابقات والحاضرات واللاحقات!

معك اكره أخواتي من امي حواء لمجرد أنهن يشاركنك نفس الهواء! والرجال لانك تقضي قسطا من وقتك معهم بحكم المجتمع السخيف!

ان اجمل مافي مشاعري الخفية معك، انها مبنية على احترام ، الكثير من الانسانية والعقل ...

والعقل هو مفتاح قلبي المشتعل بنشوتك المجنونة الماجنة المعقدة التي صعب على السابقون والحاضرون واللاحقون الوصول اليها ،،،

Mie Mie

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Selfish Obsession

2011-11-04T05:58:00.001-07:00

Is it okay if I want you for me?
Is it ethical to want you all for me?
No one to share with?
No one to talk, laugh or argue with
Not even smile or get mad at!

I want your joy, pride, depression, sadness, anger, madness, lust, mind and beyond! All mine!
I would ask for your soul too, well I think I'd go that far...

Don't get me wrong, I don't want to control or captivate you; All I want is you, to only be for me!

Is it okay to keep you inside a crystal jar? Maintaining your shining beauty & glory?!
See! I'm not that horrible after all!

It's not a sin to be selfish in love,,
Yours make me obsessed in details!
The way your eyes look straight into mine when you're talking, then quickly run through my lips.. Neck & beneath when I'm talking!
The way your hands move when you're explaining anything!

I love your hands! So neat & sophistically aged...

Have I told you how memorizing your details are?
Or the magic of your words on me?
The highest sky I reach when I'm with you?
The joy you leave me with after our talks?

All that & more, you want me to share with another soul?
Watch someone else feel like a Goddess just for being around her?
I'd kill her, yet still lock you away from all sights! Except mine...

So tell me, is it okay to keep you, your love & beyond, all for no one but me for the rest of your life?!

Yes it is ... my selfish obsession !

Mie Mie

Love, hate & more

2011-10-27T14:48:00.001-07:00

I opened my blog and the first thing I see is "New Post" page, as if it felt I want to write after a long time of desertion !

This white space is so tempting! Any white surface is... In fact any blank surface is just as tempting as a jar full of Godiva dark chocolate!

Did you know dark chocolate makes me high?
I believe I am born with more than 0.1% of alcohol running in my blood.. That's why good music & dark chocolate take me to the sky ...

Or maybe it's just the devil in me who's putting all this in my head!

Someone told me when I argued with her that all my analysis and the way I saw thing are not true and "it's only in your head"

But when others read her texts, they told me "the only wrong thing is she ... Not your head"

What's with people and my head? They always blame it when I disagree with them.. My head is not to be blamed, it's your attitude with me & my brain you morons!

My mom always told not to share my upcoming plans with anyone, because in my society envy is سيد الموقف
For the past 20 years -more or less- I argued that point with her saying "we don't live in somiliya ! Everyone have everything!"

Now that I am 27 , almost, I found out that: true! Everyone do have everything, but they don't kiss & tell.

My sisters never told me their real upcoming plans or secrets, they lie to my face & I hate liars! Unless they want my help

My cousins who are "supposedly" my childhood friends, never ever told me whats on their minds... Yet they don't like it when I do the same!

After an almost 27 years, its ugly to admit that ... My mom was right!

When I wake up to get anything done in the morning, I look like a zombie & act like one! But if I was going for a morning coffee or catch up with my less than 5 friends, I jump of bed with so much energy & positivity...

That is because I don't love obligations & must dos ! I hate renewing my ID cz I have too, I hate school cz it's a must & I hate socializing for the sake of hunting a husband!

Some men are really disgusting, I only blame their mothers for raising jerks who walk with pride for breaking a heart .. Or maybe a dozen!

Back in the naive days, when all I wanted was a husband I love & a family of my own, my heart was easily slashed .. Two times were enough to turn me into a slashing heartless monster..

The 1st time is always shocking, but the 2nd is the ugliest cz you think you're aware of love, have it all, everything is fine, you lie & you know it... So when your heart is broken for a 2nd time, it either makes you or devastates you!

Now, being naive is not a lifestyle, it's a mask I put on sometimes when I miss having a broken heart... What is a human without misery ?

I love smokers, men who don't have a minus .. In fact I notice that nonsmoking men gossip like us more than smokers do!

I met a guy for our 1st & last "urgent friendly coffee" and he talked shit about people I've never heard about before that "urgent friendly coffee" ... When he was done gossiping about complete strangers to me, he never called back & I thought something was wrong with me, until I found out he only wanted to bring out all the kept-in-gossips ... And he doesn't smoke! Ugly fag!

I love smokers because of the first man I fell in love with , not the 1st one I dated... There's a different!

He was a heavy smoker, there was something about the way he hold his cigarette, when he press it with his lips & blow out the smoke... I watch him & see myself being held, squeezed & blown !

So I added on my hidden Price Charming (husband) list: I want him to be a smoker.

But I don't want my man to treat me like his cigarette, smashed or thrown after pleasure. I want him to treat me the way he treats his car! Like a queen :)

Some men get me wrong cz I speak loudly about my guy friends... They are friends not hoes to sleep with! The ones who do get me wrong only look at girls as a sexual pleasing tool.. I blame their mothers for that!

I know I know! Men are visual creatures. But some of them use one eye to fantasy & the other to think/communicate like a human being, the way God created him.

Those who look at us only as their bed amusement, decided to become animals though God made them humans!

That's why we are judged on our choices & forced on the outcome.

Yes! I'm liberal & believe in judgement! people should be believers in God regardless of their choices in life; simply because we wouldn't have a life if He didn't want us to!

Yes I am liberal, a rebel on traditions & society, strong supporter of freedom in everything , believer in love & in friendship between men & women... And I want to go to heaven :) for being at least an honest human being!

My small left toe hurts :/

I'm tired of secretly liking someone, but I am completely helpless about it!

Admitting love in places like this society, turns a woman into a hoe! But a man into a more man & an excellent player!

Anyways, what can I do with someone I had a crush on for years & can't hide it any more?! Such a waste of time, brain & emotions! But my stupid heart is a قفله! It wants no one but him now!

You know ?! I'll just ignore it then it'll forget about him.

But this time I don't want to play games, no naive masks, this time -like some past other times- I want to be myself to the fullest ... In love; to enjoy & live it, just be yourself to the fullest! If he doesn't love the full package, someone will ,,,

Any hows, I like him so much & he doesn't know, maybe he does ! I don't know :/ what I know is.. I like you!

Cheers for now
Love forever
& always listen to the sound of the wind !

Mie Mie

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scrambled

2011-07-19T16:30:00.000-07:00

it will take a lot of efforts

something bigger than an emotional quake

to get me back to the love map!

the heart is too wrecked

the mind is too shocked

my inside can't seem to trust anyone anymore!

i view the world in a different eye

i see people in a stranger way

nothing is the same!

I hope its just a phase,

I'll get over with,

Once I do, I'll fall in love again...

Yet I am sure I am revolting against my believes, views, self!

It is an on going inner conflict!

I don't know what to expect; but i'm sure it is for the best!

Moushie

Lie ... Pain

2011-07-18T08:15:00.000-07:00

The problem is ... i dont understand how some people are created to destroy you, downgrade you, make you feel like you are a worthless being, a trash, someone who never was their "soulmate" ... all of that at a blink!

Why?! do you wake up every morning say "i will fuck her/his life" planning and exhisuting your mind with ways and says to make someone feel horrible about themselves!?

Could this be the goal of your creation?! Born to mess people's life?! No one caused you pain in the first place.. why?!

This year, i met .. No! let me rephrase that
This year, i've been slapped over and over from people I thought they were the closest! But boy i was sooo wrong!
Now, i reached a place where the slaps don't leave any effect, just deepens the pain! My fear is, I bubble, stop trusting anyone anymore and wont be able to see who's a friend and who's not!

They deceive ... lie ... Cause pain
They leave ... live ... & you still wonder how could someone was so close cause all damage in the world?!

Moushie

Crowd

2011-02-16T21:36:00.001-08:00

Crowd of thoughts
People
Faces
Memories!
Junk of ideas
Loads of To-Do
Meaningless thoughts!
And plans of killing few people -joking! Wakes me up everyday at 6 am & prevent me from....
A nice
Deep
Sexy sleep!

Bonjour :)

Moushie

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Location:Salwa Block 6 Street 2,,Kuwait

Dear 2011 ... Exceed my Expectations

2010-12-30T03:48:00.000-08:00

Are you ready to be the new year?! how excited are you to enter history when we write you down on our books, notes, letters, events ???

Well, i that's not what I'm writing you this letter!

Dear 2011,,,

Please be ... i don't know what words to begin with! Generious?! Kind?! Gracious?!

2010 was a year of blesses, challenges, and a lot of life determing decisions! It was supportive when I took a "life-changing" decision; no matter how hard that decision is! It proved to me that any decision i took, was the right one!

2010 made me outgoing! brought me back to me "rebillion" roots and help me stand up for my choices; no matter how crazy these choices were!

2010 was also generious in love; i guess Venus liked staying over at my heart maybe for its "great" hospitality! :p Or maybe because i stopped letting a chance of love pass by for "stupid-social" reasons!

2010 tought me that love goes beyond society, traditions, religion & boreders! The more one fight for a "two-sided love" the more one will gain from it! Gosh how 2010 love made me stronger, more mature, optimistic, determined & thankful for every moment I'm living on this planet! in other words, love made me happy ... I love you :)

2010 made me appreciate more the ones who appreciate me, especially at my worse! Its true i lost people in 2010, especially friends. But when someone leaves your life, be sure that they are leaving to give a space for better ones to be in your life :)

Dear 2011,,

Be as gracful as 2010 was... fill my days with joyful moments. But if you want to be mean & make me drop few tears, let it be for something worth it and reward me with something beautiful later!

Dear 2011,,

Be as generious as 2010 was... when it took something or someone, it granted me better ones! When it closed a door, it opened million doors! And when it ended something, it grant me the beginning of something amazing!

Dear 2011,,

I'm not asking you to be better than 2010; just be equal to it! Well, if you want to be better, I wont object! :)

Dear 2010... I love you, will miss you and will always be one of my favorite years!

I WANT!

More love! Let's say I'm a spoiled brat when it comes to love!

Show the world what I got in painting, photographing, travelling, reading and maybe writing!

Finish my studies & gradute!

Health and happiness amoung my family and friends

Perhaps ... a lovely 1 or 2 or 3 or 10 million KD ;p

Happy New Year Everyone ;*

Mie Mie

meet again?!

2010-08-28T06:07:00.000-07:00

Are we or are we not?

Will we or will we not?

Hope? Miracle? Faith? Believe?

i don't know

what it will take

for us to be "happily ever after"?!

Is it fair?! I don't know what "fair" even means!

Does "fair" exist? I don't think so!

Who knew we will meet again?

Fall in love even deeper than before!

Who knew that this love

Will turn into my fairy tale,

and you will be my prince charming?

Who knew that your love

will revive my wildest dreams

unleash my craziest wishes

and work so hard on making them real

I don't know when will we meet again

It is one of my wishes

Which I am working so hard on making it happen, and who knows...

Maybe this time will meet, and stay together forever!

i love you

Mie Mie

Away ... But Never Gone!

2010-08-25T01:15:00.000-07:00

Hellooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

i know i know i've been away for a very long time! Apologize for that :/ but i didnt mean too! -well maybe a little ;p

As a form of an apology i have so many stories to share with everyone, juicy ones! Ready?!

1. The White Dress Dream... No! It isn't like The Dream

Its kind of hard to find a perfect match for marriage nowadays, blame it on stronger social education, women movements, globelazation... anything! Women nowadays are more independent and the older we get, the picker we are interms of choosing Mr. Right.

I'm one of those picky women, i look at every single detail when it comes to choosing Mr. Right, cause he is suppose to be Mr. Right, right?!

Short story: family arrangement, the son of my aunt's friend, freshly graduted from overseas, recently employeed in one of decent government places, highly educated, "broad-mineded", not bad looking, proper age and Taurus... what can I ask more?!

I insisted on an engegment, a long one -that wasn't very welcomed in my family- but i had every right to do so, i don't know the guy.. he doesnt know me as well... This was a condition before any move was to be taken and he was okay with it.

The engagment happened, everyone was happy that the rebellion girl was finally "almost" setteling down. Then things started to change...

"let's get married in two weeks!"

"YOU WERE THE HEAD OF MOSTAQILLA?! AND PROUD?! HUH"

"I maybe studies abroad, but Im very (sharqy) tradition in kuwait, westren abroad"

"Why dont you wear Hijab?! Cause I have the right to ask you too and you must obey me"

"change your job"

We would agree on something, i find out later that he agreed with his "mother" on something else! Claiming that I want it that way!

Things got dirty, ugly and nasty!

He made me feel like a cheap meat, someone who is there only to obey him and satisfy his sexual needs. (PERIOD)

When i was 100% sure that this was his idea and only reason of marriage, i canceled it all! Blow out my family's dream of "settling down" and his dream of being his "slave".

What did i gain?! extreme self-respect! I didnt comply with the society image of a "successful girl" who should be married and has a family. I didnt comply with saying ظل راجل ولا ظل حيطة which means its better to be with a husband than single! I'd rather stay single for the rest of my life than be a slave to a retirded man!

I also learnt to stick to my dreams, no matter how silly or impossible they seem to others! if i believe in them, they will happen.

In my family perspective, i'm still rebellion... never cared, still proud and always will be for who i am!

Marriage?! CLOSED TIL FURTHER NOTICE :)

Then came the getaway to Beirut... A summer to remember! Next Post :)

Mie Mie

i love you

2010-06-15T07:37:00.000-07:00

When things go badly wrong

To a point where it can't be fixed

Thus I start to lose my faith

I close my eyes, take a deep breath & say "WAIT!"

There is no life without hope

There is no hope without dreams

There are no dreams without believes

& there are no believes without faith!

I have faith in God

I believe in happy endings

I dreamed in meeting u

I hoped in finding u

& life made that come true!

If u r a living dream, it means so many other dreams can be real too, and you give me hope in life!

I love u for being in my life

I love u for giving me hope

I love u for being real

I love u for making me believe that no matter how harsh things can be; only strong faith can kiss any pain away!

i love you...

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 20

2010-05-02T07:02:00.000-07:00

People Who Torn Me Apart (1)
Waleed

"Yuma 3aysha nezlay ta7at, el nas yaw"

Her tender soft voice came through the intercom of my room, where I was dressed up with simple light makeup and a long ligh gray dress with baby pink florals. Rawan and Maryoom were with me in the room to calm me down.

"Enshallah" I hang up and walk to the door.

"Don't worry, etha matabina gulay... mu meth6ara tjamliin!" Maryam said

I took a deep breath and said "yseer kheir, ymkn ykun ohwa nseeby! ly muta awagef nseby 3ashan wa7ed mu shareny"

Rawan just glared at me with a sad look, Maryoom stood quietly and i left the room.

Going to the hall-room from my room felt like the longest time ever! I felt every step, my heart was beating strongly and my hands were shaking, something from the inside screamed "DON'T! JUST STOP WHERE YOU ARE!...

"EVEN IF HE WASN'T A7MAD, HE IS NOT THE ONE! HE WILL TURN YOUR LIFE INTO AN ENDLESS HELL! YOU DON'T DESERVE THAT! YOUR EDUCATION, KNOWLEDGE, PERSONALITY! WHO THE HELL HE IS TO BLACKMAIL YOU!...

THIS IS NOT YOU! PLEASE STOP!" said my inner voice with despratness because I ignored it and went toward the hall room.

and I was SHOCKED! STUNNED! FROZED!

Every one stood up and my mum said "yuma salmay 3ala 5altch Om M7amad ...." all i can hear is BLA BLA BLA!

I was frozen in my place! Hessa -who was sitting next to mum and Dana - had to get up, walk toward me and gently pull me to greet the mother, two sisters and ... WALEED!

"mesta7ya bnayatna!" Dana said to break the ice as mum was anxiously smiling

i greeted the ladies, and immediatly sat down between mum and Hessa. My head was down, not because i was shy, but because i was exteremly shocked.

Waleed, who digged my passed controls my present and will draw my future, is the same man I met last year ... randomly!

They kept on talking, i didn't hear them, I circuled myself in a bubbles of wonders and shocks! Waleed, on the otherside, kept a focused straight eyes on me with a wicked smile. He knows excatly why i was stunned and he clearly can read my mind!

His mum and sister direct any question to me and i briefly answer: Yes / No / Enshallah / El 7amdilla.

Then my mum broke the ice and said "Yuma 3aysha, gumay weya Waleed ge3daw bel salon" his mum nudded agreeing and said "ee 5alihum yet3arfun 3ala ba3ath akthar" flashing me a smile.

I stood up and directed him to the other living room, it was across a short coridor there was no doors that seprated the two hall-rooms.

I rudly sat before him, he smile, sat on a facing sofa and said "shfeeha el 7elwa mnafsa?!"

I tried to control my tempers and said "mu mnafsa, Waleed bedun laf w dawarn, enta shtaby?!"

"afa! leish hal nafs el shena? w bser3a lega6ay esmy, ya qalbi ana ..."

I intrupted him "ana mu qalbk! Please 5alik sare7 w wathe7, ana 3eraft enta meno!"

"Ana el sha5es elly a7bch w shareech!" he teased with a soft low voice

"Enta elly ana radeta maretain min gabel! Mara fy Souq Sharg w mara 3end Jhonney! tathker wela athakrek?!" i was trying to tease him

"la athker, w geltely helegy, mesa7tay feny el arth! Oo haam 7abitch!"

"Shlun t7ebny w enta mat3arfny!"

"a3arfch ly daraja kafya t5aliny a7bch, w ra7 a7bch akthar lama tseren murty!" he said with confident

I got irritated, stood up and said "7elm eblees bel jana! mumkn tetfathal bedun ma6rud!"

He smiled and said "3endy kelmten, ge3day w sem3iihm!"

and before i say any word, he held my hands and pulled me down next to him! I was terrified, my jaw dropped and my eyes popped! i couldn't say a word!

"ana abeech bel 7alal, 3ala senat Allah w rasula... ely entay t7bena mayabch ela bel 7aram, lu y7bch mayertha rayal yjesech ghera! chan teqadamlch min zman.... bs ohwa mstans 3al wathe3 ely benkm..."

My eyes got tearful and i was shaking

"ana lama se2alat w 3eraft, shakeet ena ely benkum akbar min chethy w msawyeen shay ma3 ba3ath, bs ashwa ena entay wayed anthaf min chethy w ma9ar shay benkum... w haam ekteshaft wayed shaghlat 3ana entay matadriin 3anha, ma3ena sarlkm 6 snin ma3a ba3ath!"

He looked deeply into my eyes & said "ma aloomch, ohwa mesteghel 6ebtch w san3ech 3aref shlun y5ech 3anch ashya2 wayed!"

i finally got the strength to say "ashya2 methel shenu?"

"Sheftay el shalleh ely yru7la, hatha matra3 wesakha! Maskhara w sherb w... "

my eyes popped! "Sherb?! Khamer!"

"ee khamer! w banat 6ab3an!"

i couldn't believe what i was hearing! "enta chathaab!"

"twaqa3t! ana ma agul kalam min hawa, 3endy kel el adela, el mara el yaya lama neyee tshufenhum bs 3ala shar6!"

"shenu?!"

"etha 6ela3t saj, tetzwjeeny!"

Why is he forcing his love on me?! WHY!!!

I couldn't think, all i wanted is to see the evidence he mentioned! I immediately said "ok, mwafqa, w etha 6ela3at chathab, abiik te5tefy min 7ayaty!"

"tam!" He said with wide smile.

He stood up and nodded to leave the . I walk along with him when before getting near the ladies, he slowed down and leen toward me and said with a low voice

"deray balch min Saja, ehya mu el malak ely met5aylita!"

------------------------------------------------------------

To Be Contiued ... A Woman Torn Apart

------------------------------------------------------------

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart 19

2010-04-01T05:42:00.000-07:00

A week passed since I saw Amal at my cousin's reception.

Nothing special about this week, or any other weeks, days, hours, minutes, seconds of my life... they are the same... aimless

It was 4:3o in a boring afternon when the door bell rang. I knew it was ....

"7amdillah 3al salamah" i said forcing a smile

"Allah ysalmch" he said kissing my cheeks

he dragged his trolli inside as I called the servant to take it to our room.

"shlun safrtk?"

"zaina, '3ayarna jaw .. "

i smell a hint on me , but i didnt comment.

"wein el yahal?!" he said while we sat on the sofas , on away from the other!

"Rana marat Jood khathat-ha tla3ebha ma3 3yalha, oo Khalood nayem" Jood is Walid's sister. Walid is my husband ;p

"zain tsawee Jood, wayed met3alga eb Rana oo mateb5al 3aliha bshay, ely tyeeba 7ag 3yalha tyeeba 7ag Rana" he said

i dont know why he always LOVES to remind me that he has a great loving family, and he has a great relationship with his younger sister; when he knows that I don't talk to the most beloved brother to me, Ghazi!

"Ee ya7lilha! Allah y5alilaha 3yalha w 3yalna" i said "taby terta7 aw asweelk shay?" trying to change the subject

"la badsh aqayel shway ... " he said standing up from the sofa and heading to our room "tabin shay!?"

"la salamtk... "

this is our life, or at least mine.
This is the man i married and will stay with for the rest of my life!
It is a life that has no color
Nothing special, not even me!
I know it is his punishment to me, for choosing A7mad on him.
He forced himself into my life, my family and now he is the life I get!
boring , unemotional , uncolorful life!

** May 2001 **

Few days after my mum told me some "catch" proposed, my mobile was ringing while i was driving back from work.
It was a strange no. 907####

I didn't answer the first time, but I did the FIFTH time!

"Na3am!?" i said in a sharp voice

" .... "

"alooooooooooooooooooooo?!?"

when a deep voice said " 3aysha?! "

who is he and how did he know my name! stalker?!

"mno ma3ay!?" i tried to keep myself calm and not show him how frighten i was!

"shlunch?!" he was calm and cool to freak me out more!

"etha magetly mno enta ra7 arga3 el kha6 bwayhk w a36y raqmk 7ag el maghfar!"

He exploded of laughing! really loud!

"Yuba 3a6ih raqmy 7ag oboch ba3ad, oo golila hatha Walid theba7ny w yabee yetzawajny!"

@@

I hang up immediatly! Some psycho calls and says his name with confidence and courage! MAYNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!

He only sent an SMS saying " ya 7elwch lein tetwahgain! 3muman sogay brekada w ana aklmch gabel latgayleen "

And he knew when I took my nap! I was freaked out! When I reached home I switched off my mobile, had lunch and went to my room to sleep, called A7mad from my landline

"7abiby, ana banam w msakra jehazy, deg 3alay 3ala raqam dary etha taby shay"

"leish sakartay jehazch, 9ayer shay?!" he asked with a caring tone

"la, bs maly 5elg a7ad mn el dawam aw refjaty ydgun 3alay, ta3bana w aby anam" i said

"eeeeeh " he sounded suspecious! He felt something wrong, it was obvious from my disturbed voice

"enta shbetsawy?!" changing the subject

"el youm el arbi3a, raye7 el challet, msawyiin BBQ weya el shabab. Bs entay fech shay w mara7 tgulin ela lama t5alis el salfa aw tseer museba w ba3din tfaj2iny! nafs 7jabch!"

"uff wely y3afeek aby anam w maly 5elg nejra! enta bru7k 6angart w 5tefeet shahrain! shda3wa ana mate'3ayart 3ugub el 7jab!"

" bensba lech mate'3ayartay w entay mat7seen 3ala 3umrch! 3muman, el yum weekend w maby a5arb mazajy, w 6ab3an mazaj 7athrtch! ana ban6r w bashuf el balwa el yaya shenu! tabin shay?!" He said

"LA2!"

He said "bye!" in a very concerned voice! A7mad had this 6th sence, he knows when something is going to happen, and he was right about one thing, it was a "BALWA"!

10 minutes later, as i was slowly and calmly trying to sleep, the landline phone rang, i thought it was A7mad but ...

"alo?!" with a sleepy voice

"ana mu gaylch bakalmch gabel latnamiin?! shakly te2a5art 10 degayeg!" Walid said

"NA3AAAM???? ENTA SHLUN T3AREF HAL RAQAM?! W MEN WENLIK?! W .. W ..!" I stuttered! No one knows this number except My mom, Ghazi, 7essa, Rana, Maryoom and A7mad!

"ana bafahmch kel shay, bs entay haday... " he said with his calm deep voice

"SHLON AHDA W ENTA MADRY MNO BS T3AREF KEL SHAY 3ANY! KEL SHAY!!" my voice was shaking

"mu kel shay, bs ashya2 asasiya, ana aby a3aref kel shay 3anch .. w akthar ba3ad. bs mara7 atkalam lein ta5theen nesm w tehdain!"

something told me to go along with him, because anger and rage wont get me anywhere!

i sigh and said " tefathal ... "

" Dam fathlch yal '3alya, esmy Walid Al **** , 3umry 28 ashte'3l fy el Qwat el 5asa , 3askiry ya3ny oo ana adry ench mat7biin el 3asaker ... Entay esmch 3aysha Al **** , 3umrch 9ar 25 shahar February ely 6af , teshta'3lin fy Hay2at el Zera3a , merta7a hnak la2ena muderch raye7ch min el boma Marwa! 6al3atch bedat t5uf, rfejatch el grab ma3dudiin 3al asabi3 ... Shenu ba3ad t7biin t3arfiin?!"

I was STUNNED! How did he know and why?! Only close people knew these details, my birthday and work! How did he know?!

I gathered my strength and said "mashallah , msawy researches 3adel 3alay, mumkn a3aref shtaby?! "

"Salamtch yal '3alya, ee nseit agulch, entay be7jaab wayhch mnawer akthr mn gabel! 3einy 3alich barda, mazyuna! Ana aby atqadmlch , w abech bel 7alal , shgeltay?! "

" shlun awafeq w ana ma3arfk! "

" tabin tkalminy gabel?!"

"laa2 mu hathy qasdy! qasdy shlun awafeq atzawaj 3ala 6ul 3ala wa7ed ma3arfa?! ana mu bayra 3end ahaly! Oo etha taby leish ma5aleet omk edg 3ala omy!? akid t3aref raqam beitna!? Aslan ana metqademly wa7ed! "

" ana magelt zawaj , ana gelt aby atqadam , twafqiin 3ala hathy el 5e6wa?! 3ashan el walda matenrad , la2enha dagat bel fe3el oo omch maradat 3aliha 9arlkm youmin! " He shocked me!

" ana ... ana madry shagol! "

" 3aysha , entay bent ayaweed w ana min zman 5a6ry feech , wayed te3abt 3ashan a6ale3 kel hal ma3lumat 3anch , 3erft ench mu mal le3b ... Ana abeech bel 7alal , shary mu baye3! Aslan ana lu a3arfch min zman, chan al7in 3endna 5 yahal ! kel sena wa7ed ! Bs awal sena bedun yahel"

he released a sarcastic laugh, a laugh that made me realise he was hinting on my 6 years relationship with A7mad!

" ana bakhlich al7in , w bs atmana ma6awloun 3al walda... shufeny entay mu 5asrana shay" he said and i was quite!

"tamrin 3ala shay yal '3alya?!" I could feel his smiling face, as if he won a medal!

"la2, bye!" and i hanged the phone.

I couldn't sleep that afternoon, tose and turn in bed, flipping all the thoughts in my head and i didn't know who to call!
2 hours later, i found my legs drifting me down to the hall, i sat next to mum who was watching TV and said

"ana mwafqa, degay 3al mara 5alyon!"

-----------------------------------------------------------------

To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Mie Mie

I Am A Free Soul

2010-03-24T06:39:00.000-07:00

“The secret of happiness is freedom. The secret of freedom is courage" Thucydides quote

“Anger is never without a reason. But seldom with a good one" Benjamin Franklin

...

A rush or blood floods through my veins
while blood pressure rises!
Everything in my inner and outer system screams
out and loud
fighting for my right of freedom
in everything i deside!

Stop right there!
Who gave you the right?!
To judge me wrongly
rudly and loudly!

Who told you that
screaming in my ears will make me bow to your demands!
I am not claiming that I am prefect
unsinable!
But I reached a stage of life, and age, where I can clearly figure what's wrong,
and what is right!

Anger and rage never solved any "case"
Especially with mie!
Anger and rage causes all damages, hurt and pain
Not only to my heart, but also my ears and brain!

I will make it clear
I don't like drama, hurt & pain
And you have to accept that...

I am a free soul, and that's how I am meant to be!

So don't use a tone with me
Nor demad with rage
It will only make mie stubborun
and that is the last thing you want to face!

Mie Mie

* sigh *

2010-03-21T07:46:00.000-07:00

When ever I remember

a wide smile finds its way

a cheerful chill invades my being

and a * sigh *

I miss you

That's all I can say

Our time, talks, stares...

I recall all that and I * sigh *

Deep breath,

Glare at the space,

Then a smile finds its way,

through my boring day,

and of course my ever lasting lonely nights....

* sigh *

Mie Mie

2010-02-14T04:15:00.000-08:00

Unfound Piece of Broken Heart

Pieces of a broken heart

gathered together at last

But one piece remains

unfound between my happiness, and grief!

Bitter sweet reality ... your voice still tickels my everything

Yet, reminds me of the remaining broken heart peice

which, only you have!

I never knew the secert behind the big love i grant you

and my heart i unconditionally gave you

or memories i shared with you

And I still don't know, how you can simply, change my life upside down!

From sad to happy ... helpless to energized ...

From Mie ,,, to You!

It's been a long time, and I guess the gathered peices adjusted to the reality you

demanded!

But the one remaining peice, that completes the picture of my broken heart, still wants to believe

There might be a slight hope of a reality shock,

From You to Mie

and we could once again be ,,, ( ) anything you demand my dear!

V-Day ... The Good, The Bad and the Ugly!

I stopped celebrating V-day in 2002 -i love that year! Because first, all my V-gifts were from my friends -i love you, no offense! But i exepected MALE gifts ;p- And Second, i realized that I don't want to be loved ONE day every year, I want to be loved EVERYDAY for no occasions; all years!

EEEEEE! I'M GREEDY IN LOVE!

V-day with Mie; we both have good memories, and bad ones as well! I'm sharing few ;*

The Good One:

I remember the first V-gift i recieved that year; it was from my younger sister, Manar, who bought me a stuffed white pony with wings, and a cute red card!

I told her: thanks, but you know what would make Mie happier?!
My 8 yrs old sister -back then! - wondered: what?!
I said: if you surprise me with a gift not on V-day!
She was quite for a while then asked: i know your favorate chocolate, can chocolate be gifts?!
With a wide smile I said: the perfect gift!

-e7m! ya3ny ana el kbira ;p

I still have her pony on my bed, and Manar -who is now 15 yrs old- still surprise me with Galaxy Chocolates every now and then :*

The Bad One:

The Massacre of my heart was 3 days after one of the V-days! No wonder i didn't get any roses on that V-day ;pPp

The Ugly ... Ma7ad Ugly ela Satan! ;)

One tip about V-day in Kuwait:
Please don't bother celebrating!!! MOI will make your life a living hell -el 7amdilla it never happened to Mie; mu min kether el Valentinos elly 3eraft-hum ;p ! Heard terrible stories :(
Make your V-day min 1 feb to 13 feb ; all shops are red already ;)

To all lovers on this planet and in my beloved country Kuwait: Happy V-day :*

To all single ones: Happy Independence day; may we stay "independent" if we never find our "perfect" match! :*

To everyone: may all your days be filled with ...

Red Roses, symbol of love

boxes of chocolate, symbol of desire

and ...

Endless LOVE & ROMANCE like The NoteBook Movie!

Love you all ;*

P.S. In case anyone is interested, I want an "EDWARD" love! ;p

Mie Mie

Best Read Post for this Week (Politics)

2010-02-04T04:13:00.000-08:00

Sarcastically true! Must Read!

http://kuwait61.blogspot.com/2010/01/blog-post.html

What's going in Kuwait and BEYOND!

Speaking about Kuwait, have you heard about the "Silk City"?!

http://www.guardian.co.uk/business/2008/jul/23/oilandgascompanies.architecture
http://www.madinat-al-hareer.com/
http://www.kwtfuture.com/vb/t529.html

Another evidence of (Louder Talks; Zero Action) in Kuwait!

Mie Mie

Grammy VS Oscar 2010

2010-02-02T07:27:00.000-08:00

I am disappointed From the Grammy's!

How come Lady GAGA got only 2 awards?! she is a phenomena! In fact, she is phenomenal!

Hatha el kalam mayjooz ya sadat 7ukam el Grammy!

She was only awarded (Best Dance Recording) in Poker Face video and (Best Electronic/Dance Album) for The Fame.

Satisfying, but not enough! Enshallah next year she will gather more award, including Best Female Pop Vocal Performance

"Free yourself, and believe in it no matter what" ~~ Lady GaGa on Oprah
also check: http://www.greatpersonalities.com/lady-gaga/index.htm

~~The Oscar 2010~~

My Huby is nominated for an Oscar on his role in "Up In The Air"
http://oscar.go.com/

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3ad ra7 a3a9eb if he didn't win! SO OSCAR PEOPLE, please award my Huby Georgie!

Mie Mie

Why I'm Not Blogging?! Or Living?!!

2010-01-27T05:13:00.001-08:00

I am not living the life i want! This Master studies is taking all my time, and maybe life! and it is just Masters... 3ayal PHD shloon?!

Maybe my supervisor is giving me a hard time; or maybe it's me! I even thought of quiting, changing, blowing it ... COMMIT SUICIDE! hehe bs Akhaf Allah :(

It all started in October 2009; when I went to register the Subject of my study and took the initiative to submit the proposal of the subject.

My supervisor was impressed because I gave him the proposal, and "hinted" a GO AHEAD. I started digging and digging for sources and a case study ... bla bla bla

In November, I traveled to Bahrain to update him on what I reached in my "digging" But I was shocked from his "generous" side that I have to change the proposal, and wait for a Committe to approve it! I was stunned, shocked and sad! I litrally wasted 1 and a half month of my life digging for something that my supervisor didn't bother to inform me "it is canceled!"

Wayed zain!

Because I am a flexible person, I changed the proposal 3 times to a subject that I deeply think it is "stupid" but I didn't share this thought with him cz:

1. he is the head of the department

2. i had enough changing and urguing for something when he keeps refusing it!

After submitting the 3rd "5re6y" part in December, i waited for a Committe of Professors to discuss it with me then approve it. For my surprise, the Committe didn't need my attendence, and -again- my supervisor didnt bother informing me! I had to find out when I traveled to Bahrain!

Add to that my personal day to day drama -im sure we all have it!- I decided not to write it until January 2010 ... ejaza bkefy!

Jan = Submit Chapter One

Mar = Submit Chapter two

May or maybe April = Submit Chapter three -the final chapter

It's end of Jan, I honestly finished 70% of Chapter One! Why?! HMMMM:

1. i feel frustrated from the study

2. a friend of mine asked me a question about my study and I couldnt answer!

3. Today, i sat with another professor who pointed out the "stupid" parts in my study which made me realise that I am not convinced enough to defend it!

4. I had something more importent life changing decision to take that took over my mind for 5 months, and I had to come with an end to it! hehe and I did ;p

El muhem!

I don't know what to do, i really believe that it is a good subject to study, and I want to change the stupid parts of it. But I am really concerned with my "na7ees" supervisor -well he isn't na7ees, he is Stubborn! Which is giving me a hard time :(

I want to write him an email and explain why I changed the stupid parts, because i honestly think they are stupid! I also want to tell him to stop arguing in useless topics which makes me feel more lost!

Wallah it is driving me crazy :( Shasawee?!

P.S. Some people at work ... sa5efiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin! Oo el mafrooth, el mafrooth, they are "men"! 6al !

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 18

2010-01-25T05:05:00.000-08:00

I went out from the hair dress around 5:30 and rushed home; i did a simple hair style something like...

hope you liked it ;p

Anyways, i got my self done as soon as I reached my mom's house; soft make up and wore my outfit, put my A'abaya and shela waiting for 7essa.

I remeber the day I decided to wear Hijab; It was March 19 2001! I shocked everyone with my decision including Maryoom, who never thought it would happen.

I took my decision after going to Haaj, attended religious courses and studies Qur'an. Because I suddenly felt I need to strengthen my relation in religion.

A7mad, back then, didn't like my religious range. He was always the libral guy who never thought of religion as something essential in ones life... So when I took the decision of wearing it, he got very upset and that's when all our big problems started...

**Flash back**

March 2001

"na3am!"

"ana te7ajabt!"

"shenoo ya3nee?!!"

"ya3ny te7ajabt!"

Moments of long silence then he exploded ..

"ENTAY BETYANINIINY! DAYMAN TET9ARFIIN 3ALA KEFCH!? ANA MU GAYEL ENY MA ABIICH TET7AJBIN OO 3AJEBNY SHAKLICH CHETHY?! LEISH T3ANDIIN LEEEEEISH!?!"

"hatha el qarar beny oo bein Raby, oo enta malik she'3el! Mu 3ers or safra ana aby aroo7laha 3ashan asta2thn menk! Hatha shar3 Allah... oo enta malek ay 7ag enk tkalmny chethy fy hatha el mawthoo3!"

"Maly 7ag?!"

"La2!"

"Akeed!!"

"EE A7mad akeed; 7eta lu kent raylee chan masta2thant mnk!"

"mashy!" then he hang the phone; disappeared for a long while, long enough to make me decide to be with someone else!

****

7essa picked me up around 7PM and we won't to my cousin's Reception in Nuzha.

It was crowded but very classy! Fara7, my cousin, took care of every detail! The lighting, food, drinks! Everything!!! The theme was vintage pink, white and light green. It was an outdoor reception for giving the birth for her new baby girl.

We sat on a tabel where 3 of our cousins were sitting; we chated, gossiped, laughed and recalled good old days :)

When it was dinner time, there was an open buffiet where everyone went to it.. I waited untill the crowd becomes less.

"Yalla gumay 7u6iilch shay!" 7essa said as she just sat on the table

"bs te5uf el za7ma!" i replied

"al7ien maku a7ad! Yalla 3aysheen shenu mu yu3ana!?"

I looked at the buffiet section, there wasn't much people. "Okay kany bagoom, ayeeblch shay?!" I asked

"la2 mashkoora!"

I walked toward the buffiet, and started putting some food to eat when someone from my back asked ...

"3aysha?!"

I turned arround and it was .... i expected anyone on earth but her!

With wide open eyes I said "Amal!" ... She is A7mad's younger sister!

She placed her plate on the buffiet table and hugged me! I was mesmerized!

"asfa adry ench tabin takliin! bs b9ata7a magedart!" She said with happiness pouring from her eyes!

"la 3ady .. a9lan ana .. "

"please ge3day ma3ay! Aby asulf ma3ach!" she urged!

I couldn't think of my food, i took my plate, my million questions and followed her to a tabel where no one was sitting on it

"Shloonch oo sha5barch?!" She asked

"Ana zaina, entay shloonch?!"

"el 7amdillah, tezawajt gabel 6 months oo el 7ayat mashya" drawing a big smile on her face

I was happy for her! "Mashallah! maderait, bs shaklich merta7a... Allah ytamem 3alich"

"Ajma3iin, oo entay kan 3ndch bnt ... shesemha?! Rana! Sa7?!"

"ee! oo al7in 3endy Khalid ba3ad 3umra 4 months" i said

"Mashallaaaaaaah! mu mbayin!" she excitely said!

"shloon el dinya etdoor ... gabel 3 years eltgeena awal mara, tathkriin?! Lama sawoony mersal '3aram 3ashan t-hawnin 3an el zawaj! Oo al7in entay Om 3yal" Amal said

"EE ... " i didn't know what to say.

"3aysha ..." looking deeply into my eyes "latefhmeny '3ala6 bs A7mad wayed ta3ban! mekte2eb! dayman yesra7 oo ma nadry 3anah! Omy wayed 5ayfa 3alih oo ohwa ... "

I interrupted "Amal, Okhooch ba3ny ber5ees! Ana youm getla batzawaj galy mategdriin, getla ok ta3al bs 9arlena 6 sniin ma3 ba3th, galy laa ana wla '3ery ya5thch!"

"Bs ohwa ... ma kan bwa3ya oo dalil ena dazny akalmch!" She sadly said

"Ohwa kan sakran! Wa7da min million mushkela ma5alatna netzawaj!" I angrily replied

She was speechles, put her down apperantly ashamed from the awful truth about her brother, the love of my life!

"Amal.. entay sheftay sh9ar feny, oo kentay tgolinly ena A7mad '3aby la2ena 3amalny chethy... Ana makent aby akhaly bs ohwa ma5alaly ay 7al!" I sadly said.

"ref3ay rasch, '3al6at okhooch ohwa yt7amela! Entay el 7amdillah tezawajtay oo mashya b6reejch ... please ana a3tebrch methel ekhty oo mayhoon 3alay ashufch chethy!"

She smiled and said "entay a9lan wayeed 3alih! mumkn a5eth raqmch el ydid?! adry '3ayarty 3ashan A7mad bs wa3ad ma a36iih el raqam, oo etha sawet-ha saway feny ely tabina! edliin betna sa7?!" wincked!

"haha! Okay,, ana ba36eech el raqam la2ench we3adteny oo ana atheq feech! Bs please remember eny happily married oo ma aby ay shay y5areb 3alay..." I had to make it clear

We exchanged numbers, I excused myself and went back to 7essa. We greeted Fara7 as we were going out, and we left the reception around 9:30 PM.

I picked my kids from my Mom's house, left home, prepared and let Rana and Khalid sleep, had a shower and finally dipped myself into bed.

I knew Amal was going to tell A7mad that she saw me, so I had to lie about my "happily married" part to tease him, maybe.

I recalled the night I found out that A7mad drinks Alchohol; it was bittering, hurtful and I felt betraied! 6 years he kept such secerte from me, what else could he hide?!

-----------------------------------------------------

To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

-----------------------------------------------------

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 17

2010-01-05T05:26:00.000-08:00

7essa left around 12:30 to pick up her kids. Oh! they are no longer "kids"! If you remember, 7essa had Rawan, Rashed, Ranad & Rshood. Rashed is now 16, Ranad & Rshood (twin) are 14. She was picking up Ranad from her high school, while the boys study in the same school.

Rawan, my favorate nise, is now 19 and she is studying in USA. She got a scholarship in 2002 after her graduation and went to study International Affairs. 7essa didn't approve nor accepted her first child to study abroad, but Othman, my dad, Ghazi and I convinced her to have a different new challenging life. She left in August, i gave birth to my baby Rana in December that year.

i know what you guys are thinking, we love names that begins with letter R ;)

i went to the kitchen to prepare luch for Rana and I before baby Khalid wakes up and disturbs up with his crying! My husband, Walid, is in Eygpt with his friends for a 10 days "vacation from work stress" and I am sure from me too! Honestly, i feel much better when he isn't arround.

I made some delicious penne pasta with brocoli, parmisian cheese and white sauce. Rana helped in preparing the dinning table, plates, forks, knife, and napkins... We started eating

"mama ..." Rana said while we were eating

"Na3am mama?!"

"benroo7 3end mama Mu'9y?!" she asked

"ee bs mu al7in, ana baru7 ma3 5altch 7essa oo entay ta5thin Khalood oo tru7un 3end mama Mu'9y" i answered

"shlun aroo7?! ana ma3endy sayara!" She wondered

"ana awadeech ba3din aru7 ma3 5alty 7essa"

"oo kalid?!" she asked

"kalid!" i laughed "hindia entay?! KHALID beyroo7 ma3ach" i said

And just when we were about to continue our food, Khalid's cry from the (Baby crying machine) came out loud! So i didn't complete my lunch, and rushed to his room.

Introducing my 2nd baby, Khalid... he was born in on the 28 of Feb. 2004, just two days after my second Anniversary. he is now 4 months old... While Rana looks like her dad, Khalid looks so much like ... Ghazi my brother!

I feed Khalid, changed his dippers and got him the Living room on his chair to stay with Rana, while the servant just finished washing the dishes. I spent some times with the kids and watched TV

Time fly so quick; it was almost 4 and i totally forgot about my cousin's reception! I asked the servant to change for the kids and I rushed to my room to get ready... I got out a mid length silk baby pink skirt with it's lace sleeves shirt and a see through colored pullover jacket.

After my quick shower, I called mum to tell her I am dropping my kids, then called my hairdresser and said "i want a nice quick hairstyle, coming in 15 minutes!".

Took my kids, the sevant and drove to my mother's place, wearing my Aabaya and shilah!

Yes, i wore 7ijab in March 2001 it was a sudden decision that no one expected! Of course my parents were happy for it, as well as my sisters... The only one who refused it was Ghazi, who i haven't talked to since December 2001!

>> December 2001 <<

"Enta shloon tesma7 7ag nafsk teda5al fee 5sosiyatee oo testa'3felny!?" i yelled

"lat 9ar5iin! ana O5ooch akbar mnch oo lazem te7tarmeny!" Ghazy said

"Ay e7teram?! enta 5aliit feha e7teraam?! Met3arefly 3ala wa7da ma adry min wein oo m5aliha t7u6 3einha 3alay bel dawam, oo tetgarab meny besem el Sadaqa 3ashan twa9ilk a5bary awal bawal?!! Shloon chethy tsawee!!"

"Entay leish mu rathya t9adgiin ena el salfa kelaha 9arat 9udfa?! Ana a3arefha gabel latroo7in el Hay2a oo gabel latetwathfiin fee nafs el qsm!" His voice got higher "oo ma7ad kan yabee ysta'3felch oo el bnt magalt ela kel 5eir 3anch?!"

"kel 5eir!" i said sarcastically "akeed betgoolk 3any kel 5eir la2enha kanat rasma 3alik ya Ghazi!!" I said looking staright into his eyes with mine full with anger and disappointment!

We were fighting in the living room, Mum came quick from the Kitchen hearing the arrguments and interfered "shsalfa?! shfeekom!!"

"Se2alay weldch!! El mu7taram!" pointing at Ghazi

"Ana mu7taram '3asben 3alich!" He screamed!

"lu mu7taram chan ma7a6iit wa7da tetlazag feny 3ashan tetgarab mnik!"

"Wa7da!?" Mum wondered "Meno hathy!?!"

As i was about to say her name, Ghazi screamed "3AYSHA!" hinting not to say another word!

"Saja!" I screamed her name out of anger

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To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

-------------------------------------------------------------

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- Backward!

2009-12-14T04:00:00.000-08:00

Quick flash back; in case you forgot what's going on:

2001 New Year Party was a blast! Everyone was there; we had so much fun.

Family men were at the camp.

A7mad was partying in the shalleh; and he sent me the sweetest message for New Year.

------------------------------------------------

>> some where in 2004 <<

"mama ... mama!"

"hmmmmm"

her angelic baby voice said "mama gumee! kalty 7essa tabee"

"ok mama al7in agoom; wein o5ooch?!"

"sleep" putting her cute hands on top of each other, under her cheeks & closing her eyes, acting Khalid's sleep.

I smiled and kissed her cheeks

"Yalla mama gumeeeeee!" she said with a louder tone!

"enzain... enzain!" stretching my arms, looking at the clock, it was 10:30 am.

I got up and baby Rana left the room, had a quick shower to freshen up and went out to the living room, where my baby girl Rana was playing peacefully with her dolls.

I sat on the sofa and asked her "mama Rana, wein khaltch 7essa?!"

"sawat alo; oo galat gumee mama 3aysha" she replied

I sarcastically said "gumee mama 3aysha?! 7abibty esmha ga3day mama 3aysha"

"gaaa' ... dee " my cute thing was trying!

I laughed and she got upset! "mama! aloo kalty 7esa!" she turn around and continued playing

"enshallah 3amty Rana!!" i kept on laughing

I dialed 7essa's mobile number and waited for her to pick up the phone...

"aloo!" she said

"halaa2 7esaa shlounch?!"

"9a7 el noom 3aysheen! 3ayara bntch 9arat tred 3ala el telephone! 3eshtaw oo tguly mama sleep!" said 7essa

"ee smelah 3aliha; lata7sdeen benty thekray Rabch!" teasing her!

"mashallah! chebaa7!" she laughed then asked "agool 3awash, betyiin esteqbal Faroo7 bnt 3amty?!"

"ee baroo7 ... nru7 ma3a ba3ath?!" i asked her

"ee leish la2, a9lan ana makent baroo7 broo7y!" she said

"haaw leish?! She5a oo Dana mara7 yroo7un?!" i wondered

"el dectorah 3ndha 3amaliyat madry shenu! oo el muhandesa matadry wein twady 3yalha la2ena omy ma taby troo7 oo malha 5elg yahal" replied 7essa

"enzain sh3endch al7in?! mureny 5an sulif shway..." i suggested

"tawny 6al3a mn el jam3iya, el yahal bel madresa, wein raylch?!" she anxiouly asked

"msafer! yalla ta3alay 7e9oo!" i begged her

"enzain enzain kany yayah!"

we ended the call and I went to kitchen to prepare some tea and coffee for the (Chay Th7a) catch up with my sister. Rana was still playing with her dolls and Khalid was peacfully sleeping.

15 minutes later

^^ DOOR RING ^^

I opened the door and 7essa was standing with a box of cake from Mr. Baker, we kissed cheeks and she came in.

"leish kalaftay nafsch?! matyoozin!?"

"el cake latheeth ma3 el chay! yalla 9ubely"

Rana approached 7essa with a shy smile and kissed her cheeks -- so adorable! and stood in her place.

"ya ba3ad qalbi dala3 el banat!" 7essa said as she kissed Rana

i smiled and said to Rana "yalla mama ru7ay le3bay"

She went back to her dolls as we started talking...

"betyeeb el dala3 min meno '3erch!?" said 7essa

"t-hageen?! ya3ny mu min Walid!?" i said with a yellow bitter smile

"Oboha!! wein shaf el dala3! hatha de3la,, Ana bs bafham.... shloun rethatay ta5thena?!?!? madry!!"

i took a deep breath and ....

(FLASH BACK)

>> May 2001 <<

"yuma, metqadmlch wa7ed!"

"shesma?!"

"Walid Al ****"

"wein yshte'3el?!"

"thabi6... 3awash bnaity, Oma dagat maretiin el yum, el walad shakla y3arfch oo 5a6ra feech!"

"ma aby thabi6!"

"Ya yuma el thabi6 rayal shayel nafsa oo ysheel murta oo beita, raza oo sana3"

"oo nafsa b5ashma oo mala 5elgy! ysawely 3asker fy el mu3askar?!!!" i said

My mum laughed and said "3awaaash! Allah yeg6a3 bleesch!"
"Ya yuma, hatha 3 3aris tarftheen hal sena bedoon latshofina?! leish ya yuma, tara el bent kel makbarat kel maqalat for9ha bel zwaj... Oo entay je3dty oo aby afra7 mench gabel la amout oo ashoof a7fady" she contiued with a eyes full of tears.

I see this scenario everytime someone propose!

"Yuma ... madry leish taglbinha mana7a kel ma teqadamly wa7ed! ana ma aby atzawaj!" i affirmed

"hathy 7achwat o5ooch Ghazy oo zain meny met7amlita, mara7 asketlich nafsa oo a5elch 3ala kefch! betshofin el walad ya3ny betshofin el walad!!" She got up from the sofa heading to the kitchen ... i supposed

she suddenly stopped, turned around me and said "ely yabch, 3iyat nafsch teb'3a, oo ely tabina, 3iya el ba5at 2eeyebah! oo mara7 2eeyebah!" and went out side the living room.

and she was right!

---------------------------------------------------

To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

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P.S.

tell mie what you guys think?!?!?! it is very important to know if you like the backward style. Adry it may be confusing to some of you, that's why i need to know what you guys think (like/dilike)

luv you all & sorry for taking forever to post the new part :*

Mie Mie

My Trip to REUSE

2009-12-09T15:06:00.000-08:00

I step by the REUSE Exhibition at Avenues D9 parking to support a friend, a 3aziz 3alay friend!

So i snap some pics bs I will post....

My Favorite Reuse Project:

The smoking project! I love the concept, the contributors << you guys ROCK! Check out the new issue of Students Talk for more info ;)

My Friend's Contribution "Graffiti"

For more creative artworks, checkout his blog: http://blog.razzag.com

Best Part!

Guess who i saw?! Teddy! 7ady i'm a fan of him & his courage behind the sense friend :)
>> Sorry Teddy's friend, I couldn't take a pic of Teddy -it was very crowded!- so i took this pic from your blog -- eeeh thowy!

http://www.yearofteddy.com/2009/12/day-101-reuse-exhibition.html

If you didn't go... you missed on seeing how creative the young Kuwaitis are!

Mie Mie

Happy Birthday to Mie, Happy Eid and Randomly Randoms

2009-11-30T20:21:00.000-08:00

>> Happie Birthday to Mie <<
~$$~ CHA CHA CHA ~$$~

My birthday was on November 19th two weeks ago; and it was a BLAST! hehe in a good way :D
i got three birthday cakes (i will post pics soon) :

1 was a surprise birthday celebration from my closest and most loved group of sabaya! Norah, Delu, Nouf, Sends & Amoon :**
1 was from my aunt Amoonah to celebrate the birthday of my grand mother and I; we share the same birthday date :D
1 was from the one and only, cuppie :***

My birthday gifts were:
Blackberry Curve GEMINI! i love it i love it i love it!
Cute stuff for my room from Marks & Spenser
Swaroviski Christmas rings
Cartier pink key chain & pink pen
A crystal necklace from Granny :*
A picture portrait of mie :*

My adventure was:
A lovely one day trip to Bahrain with Cuppie :* -hehe re7t checking 3ala resalty oo 3ugub celebrate my birthday at Lilo's YUM YUM FOOD!
Not to mention, we both shopped til we drop :D

I want to thank everyone who wished mie a happy birthday and called, SMSed, facebooked, bbmed, twittered or even emailed! You draw a smile on my face ... love you all

>**> Happy Late Eid ;p <**<

First: عيدكم مبارك وكل عام والجميع بخير ولا وانها متأخرة
2nd: i spent the entire Eid in shalleh with family and relatives :* the weather was beyond fabulous; i had so much fun :)

How did you guys celebrate your Eid?! Anyone traveled?! Shalleh or Mu5ayim?! Kanat el 3i6la 3ajeeba mu?! ;p
However you celebrated it, i wish you had fun and it was a blessing time for you and your family :)

>>> Randomly Randoms :*** <<<

Twist in A WOMAN TORN APART

i took my time in thinking about the coming parts of the story, and i thought about this crazy idea which i want to share with you and know your opinion about it -you're reading the story ;)

SO... i thought about flipping the story events! Ya3ny, abalch min nihayat el qi9a, oo bedal la tfakroon sheno ra7 y9ir, abikom tfakroon SHLOUN 9AR CHTHY! la2ena el 3ebra mu bel nihaya, el 3ibra fy el shay elly sawa el nihaya; oo hatha elly aby awa9la

So my A WOMAN TORN APART readers and my blog's reader, what do you think?! Shall i start with the result all the way to the how?! Or, keep the flow of events as they are (how then result)?!

Vote and you choose :)

My Studies

Okay, it is about to say it loud, i am doing my Masters in Bahrain! I am almost done, but I am in the process of writing the Thesis. In fact, i am in the first step of writing the Thesis :S
I started one year ago, and I am happy that I took this decision. It changed my life in a good way. Yes! Sometimes i scream and ask myself "what was I thinking!?!?" because it isn't easy as people think -because it is in Bahrain and all the ciaos about it!- But i gather myself with the support of people who love mie, and I continue in it.

So, if i ever disappear for a while or stop blogging, passing by to my loved blogs and commenting, I am not being rude, I am just too busy to step by the place I love the most in the cyber world, my blog & you guys :***

Oo SalAmtKoM :*

Waiting for votes on A WOMAN TORN APART twist of events; posting the next part depends on how quick you guys vote ;p

love you all and miss you all loads!

Mie Mie

I am sorry

2009-11-23T03:44:00.000-08:00

This post is a dedication to someone very special to mie...

I am sorry for the way I am,
I couldn't find a better way to start this post,
Direct, simple and straight to the point!

Yes my dear, I am sorry for the way I am
acting rudely lately
emotionless
and cold when ever we talk about "us"

"US" is something I never saw happening
for so many reasons we both know and very aware of
However, "US" forced it self on both of us
smoothly and gently... it blend in our lives.

For some reason, I didn't fight the flood
the revolution of emotions
it simply felt ... right? nice? secure? all and more!

It is like a birthday celebration, everything about it is fascinating
but once the night is over, and a new day rise
all the fascination is over, and we are left with nothing but memories!

To move on, I need to be cruel to myself
step on my heart and let go of my emotions
All that to be able to start a new "US" but not with you
to pretend that the new "US" is what I want
along comes with it a false happiness, satisfaction and maybe love
and ignore the fact that the new "US" is forced

Or maybe not

it was a waking alarm from a beautiful dream
A dream i intend to be mie and loved everything about it

and here comes another sorry
for not fighting this dream from the very beginning
for closing my eyes and allow myself to dream
though we both knew, or at least I did, that this dream won't ever come true

If you ever read this,,

Sorry for forcing an anger on myself
Sorry for the attitude
And sorry for the waste of your time...

But I'm not sorry for what I shared with you
Or for the time I spent with you
and never sorry for the dream I loved with you!

P.S. I wish things were different my "best thing i ever have in my life"

Mie Mie

11/11/2009 - 11/11/1962

2009-11-11T04:20:00.000-08:00

A very quick post & an urgent urge...

Today at "Sa7at Al Erada" there will be a festival to celebrate The National Day of The Kuwaiti Constitution originated by Sout El Kuwait. From 5:30 PM to 10:00 PM

A great reason to celebrate our pride of Democracy Deceleration in Kuwait.

For more info check Sout Al Kuwait site:

http://www.soutalkuwait.com/dms/sout-al-kuwait/index.php

Source: مدونة بيت القرين

P.S. I know I've been a very bad blogger lately; but promise I will be back soon :***

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 15 (B)

2009-10-24T16:58:00.000-07:00

It was Sunday, December 31st 2000

Few people came to work that day; Nahed of course was one of the people who didn't come! Marwa excused her self to leave early, and I left at 1pm since there was nothing to do! I needed time to prepare myself for tonight.

" HAAAA! el youm el 7afla?! ras el sena?! 3eshtaw!"

"ee 5alina nestanis! Awal mara nsawee 7aflat ras sena! 7ada metshawga!"

"Allah ytamim 3alikm yam3atkm enshallah.. 7abibty"

I laughed!

"shfesh teth7kin?!" A7mad asked

"7asastny enk shayeb!" I teased

"ya 7elwch lama teth7kin! 3ezamtay couzinty?!"

"EE 3ezamt-ha!" UFF SHYABEE?!

"zain, 3ashan a3aref el a5bar!"

"i won't even comment on that! Enta betru7 el challet?!" I asked

"ee el shabab metyam3in hnak, mshawee oo the7k... banam hnak tara!" informing me

"mmm adry, a9lan a7san 3ashan darab el leil ye5are3... enzain ana we9alt 3end Maryoum; talk to you later!" i said

"okay 7abibty, deraw balkoum!" He said then hang up!

I passed by Maryoum & Rawan, headed to the salon to get our hair done. They both had there outfits to change at my house after we finish from the salon.

We finished around 5pm; went home feeling so excited for tonight! Made sure that everything is prepared and well done before we get dressed.

I wore a strapless, short gray dress, smoky eye make up & a red lipstick. Maryoum wore short sleeves, mid length roses dress. And Rawan wore a short tight black skirt with a purple & black tiger strips, oval neck, short sleeves top.

Both Maryoum and I blew dried our hair, Rawan curled it.

Dana wore an adorable flow, yellow short dress with a red bow in the front. Her hair was up and wore red accessories. 7essa wore a brown, short sleeves, long length silk dress with her mid length hair left down in a nit style.

She5a was the shock! She cut her short,, really short!!! i mean BOB haircut! she looked so sexy the family Dr. with a short, glittery tight black dress!

"She5ooo! shenu hatha?!" 7essa's eyes popped when She5a came downstairs!

"new look for new year" said She5a with a full of a confidence smile!

"5alty She5a 7adch tshawgiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin!" Rawan said

"EE mashallah 7elwa 3alch el gassa" Maryoum said

i stood there speechless! Mashallah she look gorgeous !

"mashkourin! 7abit asawiha mufaja2a, 3abdallah yadree eny gaseta bs mashafny lel7in!" She5a said

"Allaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! new look!" Dana excitedly yelled while coming down and holding a dessert dish!

I walked to get the dish from Dana, placed on the table and finally said "She5a! t-hablin!"

"hehe; thanks sis!" she blushed

"new look oo new year oo 5arabii6!" 7essa complained

"HAHAHA! ehya lel7in me7tara 3al 50 dinar malout 3awashy!" Dana teased 7essa!

"chub! Aslan ana 3a6it om lsan 3ashan matlawe3 chabdy mu 3ashan el rehan! ba3din kelaha 50 dinar! shenu ya3nee?! helag!!!" 7essa said

We all laughed!

Guests started coming at 8 PM; Lamya & Souha had to complain at every single thing, but no one would listen to them except She5a -maskena!

Lights were dim, music was getting louder and mum seemed very proud from how we planned the party! She was smiling all the time and showing off between her sisters & friends! Mum is so cute!

Rawan asked some her teenage friends over, so we had to dance on teenagers songs! Of course the baby girls were with us in the party, and the boys at the camp with the men!

The party was so amazing! We would dance, while my old woman would pick up wifies for their sons! Chena 3ers hehe ;p

Saja came around 9:30 PM wearing a cocktail short dress

"3asa mate2a5art?!" kissing cheeks while she was holding a dish!

"la ma6afech shay!" then i looked at her dish and said "lesh mkalfa nafsch?!"

"la 3ady, hathy pasta with mushroom & white sauce; enshallah ta3jebkoum!" she said

"Ma Asadeg! ba3din azefch! ta3alay a3arfch 3ala mum oo 5awaty!" i said

We went to the basement where I put the plate with the other dishes & walked with Saja to meet mum & my sisters.

"Yuma! Hatha Saja sadeeqty bel dawam!" I introduced them to each other

"Mashallah 3alech!" mum said while greeting her "nesma3 3anch oo a5eran shefnach!"

Saja blushed and said politely "7ata ana 5alty; 3awash wayed tsulef 3ankoum!"

"shloun 3weesh ma3akoum?!" mum asked trying to open a conversation with Saja !!

I interfered "Yuma! mu waget el as2ela, ba3arefha 3ala 5awaty!"

"enzain yuma, fir9a sa3eda 7abibty yallah estansaw!" mum said

"Ana as3ad 5alty!" Saja replied

I introduced Saja to my three sisters, and there children. Sat with Maryoum who was with my other friends, I introduced them all together.

"Wien Rawan?!" Saja asked me

"hathy elly targe9 hnak labsa tanora soda gsera!" I replied

"Esmellah 3aliha mazyouna!" Saja said

I pointed at Rawan to come over..

"Rawan hathy sadeqty bel dawam; Saja"

"hala 5alty shlounch?!" they shocked hands

"adry eny kbira bs 5alty 3ad?!" Saja joked

"ba3ad, te5ayilay ena refijtch matertha anadiha 3awash! tgul prestige!" Rawan said!

HOW Embarrassing?!

"3eshtaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw!" Saja commented and stared at me!

"Rawan! 7sabch ba3din, ru7ay yenay!!" I said pretending to be mad! ;p

"okay aunty, bs mayloug tsawin ru7ch m3asba!" she flashed us a smile and continued dancing!

"Oo ehya el 9ajah! maylooooooooooooooooooog!" Saja said

"waaaaaaaaaaaay! kaletouny!!" i yelled then we all laughed!

When it was 11 PM; we all headed to the buffet for dinner. Everything was a true YUM YUM! From salads & soups since it was cold, to chicken & meet, salmon & shrimps! Not to mention the desserts! Another success to 7essa!

An hour passed so quick; at 11:50 PM some of my mum friends said loudly:

"kel wa7da tshuf meno thakerha hal leila?! 6al3aw hal m'3arbal oo egroolina!"

Thats when Dana stood in the middle of the hall and jokingly said "may9eer! ana ba6afy el litat 3ashan elly telefonha ysheb, n3aref ena fy Romeo aw Qayes 3end el 3ayayez, tethakarha!"

"Bar3a bntch Ya Om S3ood!" my mum's friend teased!

Mum laughed and said "ba3ad 5elgat Rab el 3alamin; Allahouma la e3terath!"

"kel el muraheqat oo el a6fal yugfoun bel ne9 oo y3doun!" Dana demanded; and all the teens & tween gathered in the middle, while Dana switched off the lights!

"Yallah 3edaw!" She asked them

The seine was amazing! girls counting down, ladies holding their mobiles waiting for the "Happy New Year" message or call!

"... five, four, three, two, one .... HAPPY NEW YEAR" all the girls said at once!

You can hear so many mobiles ringing and beeping! It seemed that most of the women & ladies got a greeting from someone; and we all greeted each other.

The night was finally over; everyone left and my sisters stayed to sleep over! It was a wonderful night.

New Year Eve would never be an ordinary night; especially that year, 2001!

A year when everyone's life changed

A year when I realized how empty my life is

A year of my inner revolutions; and some of my biggest mistake I regret all my life!

If I knew we were celebrating a year full of pain & tears & miseries; I wouldn't celebrate it!

If I knew I was celebrating a year of fake masks falling down; I wouldn't celebrate it!

If I knew I was celebrating a year when I took the most painful decision, when I found so many hurtful truths, I wouldn't celebrate it!

I wish I could turn back time and stop it at that night

If I knew that 2001 was the year were I got torn apart; I would ....

1 Text Message Received

كل سنة وانت بخير يا غازي :*

1 Text Message Received

:* وانتي بخير %#$ي

1 Text Message Received

Happy New Year Babe.. A7bch ;***

1 Text Message Received

love you too xoxo

---------------------------------------------------------------------

To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 15 (A)

2009-10-24T06:27:00.000-07:00

"shfee wayhech ta3ban?!" asked Saja

"ams kan wayed loya oo 3afsa" i replied

my eyes were redish, darkness around them and my face looked pale! I didn't sleep well and I have no clue how I went to work

"3asa ma shar?!" she was concerned

"el shar ma eyeesh; bs O5oy sawa 7adeth ams 3end bab betna!" i said

"ambeih! shloun?!"

"Wa7ed dash el frej mn jeha thanya, mesre3 oo chena e5tarab breaka; he lost control on his car, oo 6ela3 Ghazy eb wayha... oo da3amaw" I explained

Saja's eyes poped put "Oo 3asa ma9ar fy shay?!"

"la bs ratha bra9a.. El 7amdillah"

"eeh el 7amdillah! ya 3umry 5a6ach el su"

"5a6ach el laash" I said with a smile; how kind is this lady with me?! :) I like how she doesn't ask too many questions about a certain thing... mu malgufa!

What was remaining of the week passed with nothing new; people from everywhere visited our house to console my parents for 3 days! The house was packed with mum's sisters, relatives, sisters in law and her friends. While our Diwaniya was crowded with men who knew dad or my brothers. My sisters visited us more than usual as wll as my BOMA brothers stood by dad.

Of course the weekly gathering was -as usual- packed with nephews, nieces, my brothers' wives as well as my sisters' husbands. Mashallah everyone was there to support mum and dad as well as checking on Ghazy, 7abib el jamee3, who was recovering ;)

Work was calm too! Same routine forced it self for 3 weeks. My boss, '9ary, extended his vacation to 2nd week on January. Marwa was weirdly silent but I didn't care; in fact it felt better to have her mouth shut for a while!

Nahed, on the other hand, would have an occasion or event to attend, EVERY WEEKEND! Mashallah she is a social bee with "less luck in men" as she descripes.

Saja was the same, adorable and sweet! I finally arranged a catch up between Saja and Maryoum, they seemed to like each other and got along well. We would go out every weekend for dinner at T.G.I FRIDAYS, cinema at Sharq and coffee at one of the Starbucks.

A7mad and I... well you can say that things were "fine" nothing new in our relationship and weirdly no fights! He gets frustrated when I hang out in the weekend, but once he hears Saja's name, he calms down saying:

"Dam Saja ma3akoum, ana a6aman!"

Believe me, you don't want to hear the cracky lousy excuses for what ever he says!

Every year, we celebrate New Year Eve ever in Challet or Camping. This Year, Dana -who is pregnant in her 2nd month with a second baby- proposed to throw a party at our basement. At first, mum disagreed and went crazy for the proposal, but when Dana said...

"Om S3ud el Na7s! el 7afla betkoun bs ahalna, ya3nee 5alaty oo Om Maryoum, 5wela Luluwa, 7arem O5wany el melaq oo cham wa7da mn refejatna!"

"LA2 YA3NEE LA2!" Mum affirmed

Dana and 7essa came over to our house with their kids on a Wednesday for dinner, She5a the practical was one her way.

I was sitting next to 7essa, eating nuts and listening their discussion

"t-hagein Omi tertha?!" i asked 7essa

"la2, bs e5tch Dano mu hayna!" she replied

"arahnch ena bensawy el 7afla, oo Omi eb tertha!" daring her!

"5asrana! 3ala cham?!" getting excited!

smilling with confidence "50 dinar!"

Suddenly...

"7essa! ta3alay shufay omch!" Dana yelled!

Both 7essa and I turned toward them and asked "Shfekoum?!"

"Omkm mu rathya tefham leish nsawee el party?!"

"maku ya3ny maku!! wein ga3din?! ana ma a7eb el mas5ara oo el 7achy el fathy!"

"Yuma!! ana ma aby arou7 el mu5ayam! ma agdar w ana 7amel oo darb!!! Ma aby!!!" Dana insisted!

"la tro7un entay oo raylch!" 7essa suddenly interfered

Dana turned into a devil with red eyes, tail and the thorn! She didn't know there was a bet going on and it was 7essa's own benefit if she supported mum! I knew the war started!

"Sheno ya3ny matyee?! Dana E5tna oo rayelha wayed zain ma3ana; oo ohwa thuna2y raylch! Ohma el jaw kela... etha mayoon, yseir malaqa!" I defended Dana

"ya ba3ad ahaly ya 3awashy! Etha ana oo raylee ma yeena, meno ywanskoum?! Lamyoo oo Soho?!" Dana said flaming fire at 7essa! LOL

"latgoulin chthy 3ala 7amawatch! 3eib" Mum demanded!

"materthen 3ala 7amawaty, bs terthen 3alay?!" said Dana with a teary eyes! dmou3 el tamasee7!

"mu gasdy, bs mn meta nsawee 7aflat e7na?! oo shenu ngoul 7ag reyayeelna?!" 7essa said

"ma aby ..." Dana started crying! "entaw mu 5ayfin 3alay, a9lan ana adry bs taboun teftakoun meny oo ma9adagtaw meta atzawaj! Ana maly '3eir raylee! Allah ysame7koum" grabbing her bag and standing up to leave - drama queen! hehe

"Yuma!!! shlun teza3lin Dana!?" i said trying to prevent Dana from leaving "Dana ga3day kel mushkela laha 7al ... Yuma kelaha 7afla oo bas; leish mkabra el salfa?! e3tabreha 3azema mu 7afla!! yam3at 7areem ya3nee!" i continued

"Ohooooo! Omy galat la2 ya3ny la2!" 7essa said trying to win the bet

"Dano! ge3day oo 5alch mn 7arakat el yahal malotch! etha 3azema may5alef, bs 6ag6ega oo a'3any oo rags maku!" mum said

"ya3nee maku ru7at bar?!" Dana said wiping her fake tears

there was a sense of winning / losing a bet ;)

"ee 5alas ana aslan hal sena maly 5elg! Bs 3endy shar6; entaw tsawoun kel shay, oo ana anzel el serdab cheny ma3zouma!" Mum said

Dana came toward mum and hugged her while 7essa screamed "laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa2!" and i laughed!

"haw! 7essa yanetay?!" mum seemed upset!

I laughed sarcastically and explained "HAHAHA! entaw matadroun aku rehan bena! etha Omy rethat, 7esso ta36iny 50 dinar!"

7essa threw a pillow on me while mum said "7amdilla wel shikr!"

That was when She5a came in with a question mark on her face "shefkoum!?"

Dana excitedly replied "bensawee 7afla bras el sena bserdab beitna! Oo 6al3at el bar 7ag el reyayeel bas!"

"nice idea! bs hathela shfehoum ytkaf5oun bel ma5ad?!" pointing at 7essa and me!

"metrahnin 3ala 50 dinar etha bensawee el 7afla aw la2, oo 3awash fazat oo 7essa malzouma tedfa3 el 50" Dana explained with a smile

"i see" She5a sat down and poured some water

"baskoum yal meyanin! 7esso ... 7ESSO! HATHA OO ENTAY EL KBIRA! BAAAS" mum yelled at us!

New Year eve was on Monday that year; we had 5 days to get everything done and prepared! I got my 50 KD from 7essa, who took care of the catering. Dana the social bee took care of the decorations and inviting people. She5a was responsible of inviting Lamya & Souha; also helping mum in convincing Dad to throw the party ! I mean "yam3at 7areem" ;)

I was responsible of the music with the help of Maryoum & Rawan. We also helped Dana in decorating the basement.

My sisters & I invited some of our closest friends; I surly invited Saja who was very excited to meet my mum, sisters & Rawan whom I always talk about them!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Mie Mie

A7bich ya Mostaqilla :****

2009-10-20T06:06:00.000-07:00

بين الانتظار والاحتساب

وبين الصبر والامتحان

آدبي ،،، عدتي زرقاء

عدتي تحت راية السواء

اليوم، سطع نور المستقلة من جديد

وآدبي ،،، كانت رائعة بكل تفاصيلها

دمت دوما يا آدبي ،،، مستقلة

ألف مبروك فوز قائمتي المستقلة في كلية الآداب - كليتي :)- وانتشالها من "مستنقع" التآلف الذي دام لمدة اربع سنوات

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 14

2009-10-17T12:01:00.000-07:00

and just when I was about to dip into my dreams .......

6AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKH!!

Bsmellah El Ra7man el Ra7eem! WHAT JUST HAPPENED?!

Let me explain something; the window of my room is on the main road... I hear every noise you can imagine from the street!

The horrible sound came from out side, it sounded like a car accident .. WAIT A MINUTE?! CAR ACCIDENT???!!!

i rushed outside my room and saw my mum behind my dad who quickly went down the stairs...

"YUMA ... sema3taw el 9oot?!" I said

"ee yuma! emshay nshuf oo enshallah maykon ely fy baly!!" she said terrified, grabbed my hands as we were rushing through the stairs

I was confuesed "shelly fy balsh?!"

As we reached the main hall, my mum went to Ghazy's room while my dad was no where to be seen

"wein o5osh?!" she asked when she didn't find him in his room!

"HA?!" i freezed in my place, i hope he isn't ...

"degay 3ala o5osh al7in shufay weinah! te7arekay!!" she yelled

Without any words, i run to the phone and dailed his number but it was ...

"mu'3laq!" i said to mum who sat next to me

"Ya Raby!" she said "ma aby a6la3 bara oo ashufa..." her tears fell heavily!

i hugged her and said "Yuma 9alay 3al neby; aked 6efa mafieh sha7an...." she kept on crying

"3awash,,, gum... gumay shufay obosh Allah y5alsh " words hardly came from her mouth

"enshallah yuma"

I went outside, walked through the garden into the main entrance, stood behind the gate and called for dad

"Yuba.. Yuba!" i called him; it was very crowded and so many men were gathered around something seemed like a car accident

I tried to see my dad but there was no sign of him in the middle of the crowd! I got worried and walked few steps outside finding a way through the crowd to see the most unforgettable view of my life!

Our neighbor, 3adnan, was screaming on the phone "WEINKOM?!" my dad fell on his knees and guys were giving him water, two cars were crushed badly... one of them is Ghazy's car!

I freezed in my place and the only question flashing in my head is he alive

"WEIN GHAZY?!" I screamed as some guys were pulling the men from the cars

"WEIN O5oy?!" I asked dad, yet he didn't answer me!

I looked at his car, the front glass was broken as the front of the car was completely smashed!

I turned to 3adnan and yelled at him with tears fell from my eyes "agulokom wein GHAZY?!"

"lat 7aten, o5osh wado el shabab el mustashfa oo na6rin el as3af ta5eth el thany!" he said "ya 3aysha, waday obosh da5el oo 6amnay el walda!" he continued

AMBIEH MY MUM!!

The idea of him being alive was a relieve! But I had to manage the situation here! As I was holding dad with 3adnan & one anonymous guy to take him inside I asked which hospital he went

"Mbarak, oo tfathelay telefona" 3adnan said "ana al7in baro7 7ag o5osh"

"bayee ma3akoum!" i said

"la yuba mayseer! entay ge3day ma3 ahalsh oo degay 3ala o5wansh 5aly eyoun mustashfa Mbarak!"

As we reached the Hall door

"WELDY!!! SH9AR YUMA 3AWASH?? WELDY GHAZY WEINA ?? ALLAH Y5ALISH WEIN WELDY??" mum cried hysterically

we placed dad on the couch, i didn't say a word because i just ran to get some water to dad

"La ya 5alty Ghazy enshallah mafeih ela el 3afya!" 3adnan told mum who sat next to dad, holding his hands & crying

"3ayal weina?!" my mum pathetically asked

"Yuma lat 7ateen!" i said as i came into the hall holding the water for dad "bs met3awer eshway oo 3adnan beru7la el mustashfa oo eyeeba" trying to hold my tears back

"ee khalty ana raye7 ayeeba, 3aysha mu tensein tkalmin o5wansh" he said as he was living the house "mn re5satkom"

I called S3ud & Fawaz who both rushed to the hospital; I also called 3abdallah, She5a's husband, since he's a doctor in Mubarak Hospital & asked him to tell my sister.

Dad was speechless while mum kept on crying; i knew I would go crazy if I stayed like this, helpless! But what can I do but give mum water or assure them that everything will be fine!

20 minutes later the door bell rang

my rescuing angel came ... Hessa & her husband Othman!

When I saw her, I ran to her & threw my head on her chest! She hugged me and I let go of all my tears!!

Othman sat next to dad while Hessa, who didn't let go of me, sat next to mum pulling her head to her shoulders...

"Ya 3amy enshallah maku ela el 3afya latsawoon bru7km chethy; ana tawny dag 3ala Fawaz oo galy ena kel shay tamam oo waldna mafy shay" Othman was trying to assure my parents

"3ayal leish lel7in mayaw?!" My dad finally spoke!

"Tadry ejra2at oo ta7qiq oo loya; hatha 7adeth oo lazem y3arfoun meno el met'6arer oo meno el sebab" Othman replied

"Ana weldy mayed3am 3ayal el awadem! aked ohma el '3al6anin!" Mum suddenly said!

"Om S3ud!" Dad looked at mum "7emday Rabsh weldsh 7aay! Mu muhm meno el '3al6an el muhem weldsh 7ay! Sema3tay!" He commanded!

She just nodded and cried silently while Hessa was calming her down

Suddenly a mobile in my pocket ran; akeed Ghazy's mobile I totally forgot that it was in my pocket. I pulled it out, tried to read the name but the screen was so damaged! By mistake i pressed on the answer button:

"alo?!" i said with a teary voice

"...."

"alooooo??"

"......."

"3awash meno tkalmin?!" Hessa asked

"madry hath.. !! Sadaw el kha6!" the anonymous caller hanged up and i didn't know who they wore! I hope they are not someone who talked to Ghazy before or during the accident! 7aram akeed sma3aw el 7adeth! :(

An hour and 30 minutes passed, mum fell asleep on Hessa's shoulder, Othman was trying so hard to calm Dad down who was speechless most of the time!

Suddenly; the door was opened and...

"GHAZY!" I yelled!

Mum woke up "WEINA WELDY WEINA?!" crying!

Dad stood up while Othman walked toward the guys to help them out...

"AAAAA5 ya yuma! mafiny shay" as he was about to sit down on the couch

"la2! yebo yamy ashufa... ashema!!" mum said

S3ud and Fawaz held him where mum is sitting and he sat between her and dad! He had his head wrapped up with bandage, blood spot on his forehead. My brothers sat on the other couch with Othman while Hessa and I were sitting next to mum.

"Esmellah 3alik ya weledy" mum swap his head "ana 7esbaly..." she cried again!

"Ya Yuma te3awethay mn ebliss!" S3ud said "kahu jedamsh mafy ela el 3afya!"

"3abdallah rayal bentsh bayath-ha oo magasar" Fawaz said "3weesh! gumay yebelina maay!" he commanded

i went to the kitchen and got 5 glasses of water -- ya sheenik!

"Yuba goom desh darik oo raye7 damik mu el '3al6an bel 7adeth; 5a6ak el soo ya Yuba" Dad warmly said tapping on Ghazy's back

"enshallah Yuba .. AAAAAA5 Ya Rasi!" Ghazy put his hand on his head

"Shosho gumay nwady dara" Hessa said

We both grabbed him -of course with the help of Othman- and took him to his room, i removed the cover while Ghazy was leaning on Othman and Hessa holding him. Lay him on his bed and covered him with the blanket.

"taby chay Ghazy?!" I asked him

"la bs aby anam!" he said

We were about to leave the room when i remembered his mobile

"Oh Ghazy, mobilik kan 3endy.. ba7u6a yam rasik" putting it on the table next to his bed

"silenty Allah yertha 3alish!" he barely spoke

I did what he asked me to, turn off the lights and closed his door.

It was 12 am when Hessa and Othman excused them selves while the two BOMA's are still here! Can't they see that mum and Dad are tired?!

I sat next to mum when S3ud asked me with the most inappropriate questions!

"entay chethy 6ela3tay bara?!"

I was wearing a cotton pijama, trousers and long sleeves with a robe on top

and before I'd say a word...

"Wallah enk fathy oo ma3endk salfa! A9lan lu mu e5tk chan ana mayeet oo omik oo entaw maderataw! Goom farejna eb 6eeb! E7na ta3banin oo naby nerta7!" My dad told S3ud

"BAS YUBA!" S3ud angrily said

"Kelma wa7da ma athaniha! tesb7un 3ala 5eir!" My dad said and he stood up

Both my brothers stood up and went toward the door; gazing me with the nastiest gaze on earth!!

I held mum's hand and we both went upstairs and dad was locking all the doors then came behind us. They both went to their room and I went to mine to finally sleep!

My mobile was loaded with missed calls from all my She5a, Hessa and Rawan as well as A7mad. Plus 4 text messages

Weinsh?!

5aly Ghazy shlouna?! :'(

امي وابوي شلونهم؟ عبداالله طمني عن غازي طمنيهم

3washty... noum el 3afya :*

I decided to ignore Rawan since her mum is going to tell her all details, assured She5a that our parents are fine and...

Ghazy sawa 7adeth, bs mafy shay, kan bel mustashfa... Ana wayed ta3bana A7mad, bs aby anam... call me when u wake up

and slept after this long, tension day

----------------------------------------------------------------

To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

----------------------------------------------------------------

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 13

2009-10-11T07:35:00.000-07:00

He hang up the phone! SERIOUSLY?!?!? A3almk ya a7mad! ya ana ya enta!!!!

I was so mad from his attitude with me; I didn't say anything yet he burst in my face and went crazy for no reason! There must be something he is hiding that made him become so angry.

I parked my car in Sharq Cinema parking, entered from the Big Water Clock entrance and headed to Starbucks to find Saja in a orange short sleeves, oval neck shirt and a jeans sitting in one of the round tables facing the Clock.

I smiled at her and said "Masa2 el kheir"

Saja sttod up "Masa2 el ward" cheek kiss "esh-hal 7eloo?! tshawgin!" she said

"tamam" i replied "tabin neg3ad bara?! el jaw wayed 7eloo!" I suggested; actually I needed fresh air!

she smiled and said "ee sure, bs na6lub awal"

I ordered my Caramel Mochiato, Saja had American Coffee, pick the order and went outdoor.

"6awalt 3alsh?!" I asked her

"la2, ana dashit gablsh beshway" she said

"aha zain ashwa la2eny ma7eb at2a5ar 3an mwa3edy" i know i sound like an old woman. BS WALLAH MALY 5ELG -- OFF mnk ya A7mad! :(

"la mathbu6a" she smiled; killing me with her kindness!

The conversations were weirdly ackward; talking about work and people at work.. more talks about work when Saja said...

"Waaay! Basna sawalf 3an el dawam! sarlena nes sa3a bs dawam oo dawam! Yalla subject change; shloun 7ayatsh el 3a6ifiya?!"

What a great subject to talk about!

"hahaha! ay 3a6ifiya?! maku la 3a6ifiya wla 3a6ify!" in a way it sounded true! there is no romance in my relationship with elly mayetsama!

"leeeeeeish?! kel hal zain oo el 7alat maku 3a6ifiyat?! Ma asadeg!!" She said

"Wallah!" sipping my coffee "aslan ana hal mawal maydesh mukhy! You can say i am a bit complicated"

"I see.. so you never been in a serious relationship?!" Saja asked

"nope! enough about me, what's up with your love life?!" trying to change the subject, somehow!

She took a deep breath and flashed me with a smile "Well... i was engaged to someone before i fly to Egypt; knt a3arfa mn ayam el thanawiya, mn el 3ayla oo kan fy bena mmmm .. tegdrin tsamina 7ub el 6ufola"

"enzain..." That's interesting! I wonder who!!!

"Ohwa kan akbar mny eb sintain, oo yadres fy koliyat el thuba6, 3askary... Bs tekharajt mn el thanawiya, teqadamly... bs 3ugub farkashna" she said

He is not A7mad for sure "leish farkashtaw?!"

"ma retha adres fy Ma9er; yabiny adsh ma3had bu sentain oo ana yayba nesba eda5ilny 6ib! Tekhayilay!!!"

"mn seja!?" I was shocked, how can a man be so selfish?! "ohwa makan yadry ensh tabin tru7in Ma9er aw tabin tkamlin derastsh?!" I asked

"Emballah, oo hathy el mushkila, kan ma5ethny 3ala gad 3agly, telling me that elly tabina basawee! Bs tekhrajt, galy maku jam3a ya ma3had ya matadrisin!" She said

"oo shsawetay?!"

"6ab3an farkashna el mawthoo3 kela, oo 3ama b3eina a5arny course 3an taqdem el jam3a.. I was so depressed, bs Oboy galy ru7ay Ma9er la2en ohwa dares hnak.. Fa gadamt oo derast oo te5arajt!" Smilling with pride

"zain tsaween! Bs ohwa shsar feih?!"

"7athreta mat lama dera eny re7t Ma9er, chan ytzawaj wa7da mn el ahal kanat mayta 3alih! He has 3 kids mnha bs awal maradit mn Ma9er, maat yaby ykalmny oo ana marethet!"

"3eina guweya! shyaby?!"

"mawal: ana a7bsh entay, maby '3ersh... oo 7achy fathy!!" she took a deep breath and contiued "ana wagfta 3end 7ada, mu 3ashan shay.. bsara7a ohwa awal 7ub fy 7yaty oo kebart 3ala eda, fashel tajrubty feih 5alatny an3zel 3a6ifiya 3an el riyayeel. Bs maretheet la2ena ohwa e5tar fa yet7amal natejat e5tiyara".

I was amazed of her emotional idology or let's say (way of thinking)! Four two reasons: 1st it is very mature and independent which shows a woman's cabapilities in love and how she can control her emotions if she wants to. 2nd she is not A7mad's type; so he won't fall for a woman like Saja! Unless ...

"wayed kebartay b3eny ya Saja! Ana a3aref wayed banat dasaw 3ala Karamt-hm 3ashan rayal bs qila ohma elly methlish. Bs ma3qoola wa7da methlsh ma3ashat shay 3a6ify ma3 a7ad 3ugub ... shesma?!"

"hehe Nawaf!"

"ee .. mmm fa ma kan fy shay?!" i coriously asked

"akeed kan fy; bs wayed knt atradad fy bediyat el 3elaqa, bs3din tamshy el 2umor 3ady.. then we reach to a dead end! Bs wala a7ad fehum kan mn el 3ayla, la mn greeb wla b3eed!" she said, shutting up my doubt and thoughts of the idea of (a7mad + Saja = ???)

"a7sanlsh! aslan 3elaqat el ahal dayman fyha meshakel 5asa etha teda5elaw el ahal feha!" I said

"3ala gultsh ... " Saja commented

The rest of the evening was smooth; we talked about studying abroad and how it was my dream, traditions, families...

2 hours passed so quick that we didn't realize, we both enjoyed our time.

"esa3a betseer 8 oo e7na lel7in 3ala cup of coffee!" Saja said laughing

"EE tsadgin! ma7aseit bel wagt! i think it is time to say see you tomorrow" i winked

"hehe ee ba3ad 3ala ma nosal el beit, sarat 8:30 ya doob nla7eg nakel legma oo enam 3ashan dawam bachr" she said

We both stood up, grabbed our bags and went toward indoor

"wein saf6a?!" I asked Saja

"Soob Sultan Centre, i need to get some stuff on the way out" Saja said "oo entay b3eed?!" she asked

"la2 ehny" pointing at the gate behind the water clock

"okay 3ayal.. i had fun wayed ma3ash oo wayed erte7tlsh akthar mn gabl!" She said smiling

"me too wallah; ashufsh bachr enshallah!" we kissed cheeks and each one of us went into her own destined direction

2 hours passed ... were enough to wash away my doubts toward Saja and A7mad

2 hours passed ... i got to know this sweet lady who i met randomly and for the most anonymous reason she cares about me

2 hours passed ... no sound of A7mad

The rest of the evening was smooth! I reached home, chatted with mum, had a salad for dinner then went up for a quick relaxing shower and relaxed on bed.

It was 10:30 pm when I wanted to call Maryoum. But...

7ady ta3bana oo aby anam, bachr bs agulsh sheno 9ar

g.n. xoxo

1 Text Message Recieved

5amdat el 3afya! aslan ana ta3bana oo aby anam

love ;**

Adry wayed dafsha, bs a7ebha ;)

and just when I was about to dip into my dreams .......

6AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKH!!

Bsmellah El Ra7man el Ra7eem!

----------------------------------------------------------

To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

----------------------------------------------------------

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 12

2009-10-08T17:24:00.001-07:00

I didn't comment, it was almost 5 and i needed to get ready for my coffee with Saja with the excuse of "eeeh .. enzain 3ayal ana lazem agum abadel oo atzahab 7ag el 6al3a; akalmsh lama ard! bye"

"kelamt el 7ag tethayeg bs .. ma3 el salama" said Maryam and we hang up

She knew i was running away from the subject; the marriage subject! As much as I wanted it to happened, as hard it is to think of the reality of our relationship! Every word Maryam said was right, its been 5 years since we've been together, we fought, laughed, stood together... No one understands me like A7mad, and no one can stand being with him but me! I refused many men for his sake, and he stopped in his parents face to marry any girl of their choice!

His mum and sister know there is a girl in A7mad's life; but they don't know who! My mum, Hesa, Maryoum & Rawan know who is the man of my life!

I know what you guys are thinking ... why didn't we got married so far?! This will sound weird but I don't know! He never said I will marry you, directly. But he freaks out when someone propose!

Am I stupid to be with a man who never talked directly about marriage?! If you were in love, or ever fell in it, you will know the answer of this question...

I prayed, dressed up with a baig skirt a rosy shirt and a jeans jacket and my hair was down, greeted my mum and Ghazy who ...

"wein 3ala Allah kel hal kash5a?!" he was sitting next to mum when he asked, while mum was pouring tea for both of them
"baru7 Starbucks sharq ma3 refejty"

"chensh mthagla el mekyaj; yallah ru7ay mes7ay hal alwan! banat a5er zeman!" he waved his finger toward upstairs

Did I mention that my "alwan" were a mascara, blusher & a pink gloss?!

"shaklik fathy oo ma3endk a7ad etnajra! Mama ana ray7a tabin shay?!" I asked mum ignoring Ghazy

"la yuma Allah y7afthsh" Mum replied with a smile

and just when i took few steps away "ta3alaay!!" Ghazy yelled with a hidden smile!

"Uff Ghazy shtaby baru7 t2a5art!"

"aby salamtsh" he winked and finally smiled! HUH i knew he was only trying to tease me!!!

It was 5:30 when I turned the car and drove to Sharq, called Saja who was almost reaching the place

"ana yabely 10 minutes oo akun 3ndsh" I said

"e5thay ra7tsh, ana jarabt mn mustashfa Al Amiry, see you later dear"

"Enshallah, drive safely"

"you too"

We both hang up. I drove through the 2nd Ring Road or Share3 el 7uB toward the Gulf street passing Bnid el Gar, the weather was Fantastic since it was December! Mid chilly winter in Kuwait!

Rwieshd's voice was the best thing to hear at the moment with a classical (Lemny bshoog we7theny) i love this song!

Ambieh... A7mad! I forgot to call him! I dialed his no. But it was busy, weird! I just sent him a msg; I truly want to enjoy the moment, the day, the song and my high mood!

1 Text Message Received

"la7tha, we9alny msg"

Ana Ray7a Starbucks ma3 Saja elly tserlik 3ala gultk! Love you xoxo

"Enshallah teshba3 swalfik!!!" Saja said laughing

"Sajawee chub! hathy mu swalif, hathy el 7ub!" I confidently said

"3eshtaw!! mn emta ya 7athy?!" she asked sarcastically

"mn zemaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan! tsadgin enha el wa7eda elly fahmatny oo met7amlatny"

"la2anha 5abla oo matadry wein Allah ga6ha! Ballah 3alik matguly shlagya feik?! la wathefa, la sana3... oo na9ab oo ra3y banat! aked 3amya" She teased

"3an el '3ala6 yallah 3ad! Hathy 7abibty oo martha 3aliha oo etha a7ad 3amay fa ohwa entay! wein hayta?!"

"ray7a Starbucks Sharq,,, enzain ya Romeo, 9arlkm shkethr?!"

"5 snin b3in el 3ethal!"

"Esmela! Oo 5alty t3arefha?!"

"la2, bs tadry eny a7b wa7da"

"3ayal... meta nfra7 mnkum?!"

"HA?!"

"mn gal HA sema3!"

"laaaa .. lama Allah yaktb nseib; sh-hal legafa?! ba3din wensh hayta!?"

"legafa?! shakelha methel elly gabelha; a7ebha oo madry sheno bs a5er chay mata5eth-ha!"

"shqasdsh?!"

"wath7a nafs el shams! A7mad, bask le3eb fy banat el nas, 3ndk e5t oo 3eib tara kebart 3ala hal swalif!"

"al7in el sharha 3alay ana agulsh, yuba tadrin shlun?! gelbay wayhsh oo thelfay bely may7afthsh!!!"

"hahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaay ! 3asabt?! okay kefk ana ...."

TOOOT TOOOT TOOOT

Shtaby hathy?! The best i did was to hang up the phone in her face! Who is she to judge my relationship with 3awashty?!!! It is my fault indeed; i shouldn't share my personal life with Saja, or anyone and give the opportunity to judge it the way they want!

But ... marraige?! Taking a deep breath,,,

The idea of marrying 3awash is some how freaky, strange! I got used to us the way we are, couple of years back I would concider living under one roof. But after my fight with mum for marrying the "one i choose"... I step back and buried the idea of marrying 3awash in my head, and hers

"alo yal en6rab!" The music in her car was loud

"alo, hehe hala2"

"shlounsh?!" I miss her voice

"la7tha awa6y el music... zaina, enta shlounk!?" turning the music down

"tamam dam same3 hal 9out el 7elo; ray7a sharq ha?!"

"ay sharq?!" She wondered

OFF! ana shloun zal lsany oo getlaha sharq! ehya katba Starboucs bs magalat ay wa7ed?! SHIT!!!

"entay mu ray7a Starbouks?!"

"ee bs magelt ay wa7ed!" She knew I was hidding something!

"adry, bs akeed ray7a Sharq, la2en el gaz hnak oo entay lazem e6gin kart fy Sharq!" Trying to turn around the table

"ay shay sa7?! Kha6ik mash'3ul lama dagit 3alik, kent tkalm Saja?!" She asked

That's the problem when you are with a Smart girl! She knows everything!

"La2.. 9a7by" I lied

"9a7bik?!" she sounded mad then continued "kefik ya A7mad! ana el youm mazajy zain oo maby a5arba bsebtk! Ana adry enk knt tkalm Saja oo ehya galatlik ray7en Sharq; madry sh-hal qaraba elly tgulik wein ray7a oo wein rada!"

"OOOOOOOOOOOO ! Ana mu nagsch! Sharq wela Jebla! kefsh!!! lat 6awlin!!!"

"An..."

Wallah I didn't want to lie, or fight! But I don't know why I did that... I just don't know!!!!

----------------------------------------------------------

To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

----------------------------------------------------------

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 11

2009-10-06T18:23:00.000-07:00

Enshallah the day goes as smooth as a body butter; not in the mood of another cat fight!

Oh! Coffee with Saja today... why am i so ... i don't know how I feel!!

Uff!! speaking about "i don't know how i feel" why do I have this weird feeling about him!

Prayers, thoughts and more thoughts run through my mind as i was driving to work, and without realizing, i reached the (Shenkoo) Department, parked my car and head to the office around 7:20 AM.

Of course it was too early for Nahed or Marwa to come. Turn on the PC, asked for coffee, took a deep breath, here goes a new day of my...

Marwa arrived at 7:35 she didn't greet, and immediatly sat on her desk. She seemed annoyed for seeing me arriving before her. Naive Nahed came at 8 sharp -hehe better than last time!

"Saba7 el 5eir" with her cheerful smile

"sba7 el nour" I replied with a smile

"hala2" Marwa said coldly

Nahed started talking about a wedding she is attending this weekend and doesn't know what to wear since she gain few extra bounds... Marwa didn't participate in the conversation while I gave her ideas on where to shop, makeup and hair.

The morning was weirdly calm; Nahed was between her gossips and documenting, I was working on Nahed's dump reports and Marwa remind quite most of the time... Is there a storm behind this silence?!

Trrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrn ... Trrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrn

"Alo?!"

"weinsh mamareteny el youm?! qahwetsh bredat!" Saja said

i didn't realize it was 11:30 am when she called; time really flow!

"mmm okay kany yaya bs a5ales el taqrer elly 3endy"

"okay.. an6ersh"

10 minutes later I gave Nahed the report, revised it, and excused myself heading to Saja's office.

Adry ena Nahed malha thanb, bs ehya leish tsa3edha oo tsulif ma3aha!! ba6a chabdy... welaht 3aliha bs magdar! Wayed metnarfeza mn ams oo ... ana a3alem hathy 3weesh lama yred '9ary!

:: Saja's Office ::

"3ala maw3edna el youm enshallah?!"

"ee.. tru7in Starboucs Sharq?!"

"mmmm ,, okay! ntelaga hnak 3gub salat el ma'3arb?"

"ee .. bagulsh shay!"

"sheno?! shfesh?!"

"Marwa wayed kanat sakta el youm! '3areba..."

"twaly, shufay el sekouty louty oo hathy mataby traseha 3ala baar, te7atheray mnha! Oo etha kanat nawya tshayesh '9ary 3alish, fa hatha mara7 yser la2any a3aref '9ary wayed 7agany oo mayertha bel thelm.

"lat 7ateen, ana ra7 akun ma3ash"she continued.

i just smiled and said "enshallah kheir".

Time passed so quick that it was 1:30 pm; when i went back to the office, signed out, and went home after a weird calm day!

After a quick normal lunch with mum and dad, I went to my room and turned on the TV. I didn't want to sleep so I thought of wasting some time with the one and only ...

"entay wensh me5tafiya mn zeman 3ansh!"

and before I say any word

"ya3nee etha ana ma2as2al 3ansh entay mates2lin?!?!?!"

"waaaay! Maryoumu al7in meno dag?! Ana daga!! Fa mumkn bedal el hawash nsulif methel el bachar el 6abi3iya?!"

"na3am!"

"gelna 6abi3iya mu nafsiya!!! kefsh mara7 agulsh 7ushty ma3 a7mad oo mno sheft ams! Bye!"

"LA7THA LA7THA! leish t-hawashtay ma3 a7mad?! oo mno shefty al7in aby tefaseel!" she exsitdly said

"mu tawsh mnafsa?!" teasing her

"betgulun aw bayeesh akaf5esh!"

"HAHAHAHA! Enzin M7AMAD! 9abyak qe6a3! el muhm... Allah ysalmsh ams ana mnafsa 3ala A7mad 6oul el youm"

"leish shemsawee?!"

"Madry Maryoum,,, mn galy 3an Saja oo ana nagezny galby! A7es magaly kel shay oo aku sha'3lat 5ash-ha; ohwa 3nda sawabiq bhal swalif"

"ee athker salfat hathy Nejod elly ma3akm bel jam3a, ygulsh tserly oo tserly akher shay 6ela3 el a5 ykalemha!!"

"EE 3AMA B3INA! LA THAKRENY" :@

A7mad has a black record when it comes to the "other" girls. From the day we met back in Universaty, I would meet a girl in a class or in family occasions, she would either be his "ex" or "just friend" or "2nd, 3rd, 10th cousin" ... And this "cousin" always ends up being another girl in his life!

"enzain oo sh9ar 3ugub?!" Maryam asked

"ma9ar .. 6ab3an ana magetla shely mthayegny 3ashan mandsh bchethbat ydida, bs getla eny knt ta3bana oo maly 5elg; oo tsala7na".

"oo tetwaq3in ena Saja laha 3elaqa ma3 a7mad?!" rising the question, and the doubts in me!

"tsadgin ma a7es! ehya sh5siyat-ha '3eir oo akbar mna eb cham sena... Bs el youm ba6la3 ma3aha oo benshuf mayat-ha"

"wein 3ala Allah oo meta?!" annoyingly asked Maryam

"Starboucs Sharq 3ugub el 5"

"eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! 6el3ay ma3 el 3ethal!"

I laughed and said "lel7in madry etha ehya 3ethal aw la2 .. 5alina menhoum, matsadgen mno sheft ams?!"

"meno ba3ad?!"

"El mazyoun mal Sharq" i don't know why i called him mazyoun!!!

"7ELFAY! WEIN?!"

"Johnny Salmiya, oo zafeta!"

"ya bgara leeeeeeeeeeeish?!"

"la2ena kan yaby yrakmny oo mesak el bab oo aflam 3agad! Oo kanat ma3ay Rawan 7ady tewahagt! ma3eraft shloun atsaraf fa zafeta"

"oo tgulin 3any 9abyak! bs zain tsaween feih; kel hal 7alat oo heligy! Sej el 7elu mayakmel!"

"ohwa mu helegy, bs yaby yrakemny" why am i defending him?! MADRY!!

"3awash?!"

"ha?!" with an innocent voice

she shocked my world with "shaklsh mu3jaba feih!"

"laa shaku?!" i yelled

"dafa3tay 3anah oo ohwa mu heligy... shsalftsh?!"

"waaaaaaaaaaaaay maryoom madry shfeeny! Bs shefta 7ashny e7sas 7elo oo estanast, oo bs zafetah thag 5elgy oo ..."

"Oo shenu?!" she interrupted

"OO madry Maryoum! sej madry shfeny!!! Awal mara a7es chethy ma3 a7ad '3eir A7mad, ya3ny entay tadren eshkethr a7eba oo mat5ayal nafsy ma3 wa7ed thany '3era... Bs hal mazyoun madry shemsawy feny!" I let it out... partly!

"ymkn la2enkm tmrun eb fatrat malal 3a6ify!"

"malal 3a6ify sheno ba3ad?!"

"ya3nee entay maletay mn routine 3elaqatkm.. 3awash, entay t3arfin A7mad mn tagreban 5 snin, oo maretaw bwayeed ashya2 ma3 ba3ath... el 3elaqa etha mafeha ta'3eir, el 6arafin ymilon..." she explained

"oo sheno el ta'3yer elly teqtar7ina?!" i sarcastically asked

"el zawaj!"

---------------------------------------------------------

To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

---------------------------------------------------------

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 10

2009-09-25T18:22:00.000-07:00

It's been almost a month since i posted (A Woman Torn Apart 9); so here are last part pick up:

Rawan & I went crozed in Sultan Centre Salmiya then went to Johnny Rocket for dinner.
I saw the Sharq Guy, and there were butterflies everywhere!!
The Sharq Guy wanted to exchange numbers, but I blow him away.
A7mad is so angry because I didn't call all day... Maly 5elga!

***********************************************

"A7mad ... please aby anam oo 7ady ta3bana, waray dawam oo enta taby tehawash!"

"Ana ma aby at-hawash!" He yalled "ana aby jawab!"

"geltlek... it was a long day &..."

"ra7 nabdy estehbal?! okay ya 3aweesh! ana a3almsh el estehbal shloun 9ayer!" and just about that...

"ENTA MA5ALETNY AKAML EL JUMLA! EL YOUM TEHAWASHT BEL DAWAM, BEITNA KAN LOYA OO FAJ2A OMY TABY A'3RATH MN SULTAN CENTRE, CHENA MAKU JAM3IYA YAM BETNA! BA3DIN RAWANU 7ANAT ELA TABY JOHNNY... HATHA KELA 9AAR OO ANA MAYTA ABY BS ANAAAAAAAAAAAAM!!!"

He remaind quite

"oo teyee 7athretk, mraye7 6ool el youm la dawam wla mas2uliya, tzefny oo temsa7 feny el arth 3ashan ma dageit 3alik?! alageha mnk aw mn ahaly aw mn dawamy elly ana ma aby!!!"

Honestly, I don't like playing the Drama Queen. But imagine what would happend if I simply said "i didn't feel like talking to you! I need my space to think about your vag relationship with Saja" ??? He won't understand the part of "I need my space"! Yet he will focus on "i didn't feel like talking to you!" part and that will cause a huge drama I don't want to face it now...

"ana ... bs knt a7atsh oo welaht 3alsh" He calmly said with tone of guilt

"7ata ana walhana 3alik; bs elly yulah mayzef aw ygul testahblin" i said

"makent bazefsh oo mu gasdy, bs borodsh narfazny! oo entay met'3ayra mn 3eraftay eny a3arf Saja... Yuba Wallah el bnt tserly; Wallah!" He said

Uff! He knows me too well!!!

"Meno yab 6ary Saja?! oo ba3din la ta7km bkefk eny te'3ayart! Besmellah yum wa7ed ma adg 3alik, sawatny galba 3alik!! A7mad..."

"3youna"

"7adk maynun!"

"Feesh!"

"3ayar! enzain, mumkn anam?! Waray dawam oo enta ma warak chay!" Teasing him

"leish el na'3zat?!" He sound annoyed

"hatha el sej, ba3ad taby tez3al mn el sej?!" and before he say any word ...

"7abiby aby anam oo bachr bs agoum esa3a 6 el seb7 akalmk... okay?!" I said

"Entay mno ygdar 3alsh?! okay, tesb7in 3ala 5eir 7abibty"

"wenta b5eir"

"LA7THA!" i thought he will ask for a kiss but "ma3 mno thawashtay el youm?!"

"wa7da bel dawam, bachr agulk, good night!"

"Oh ok"

He finally hang the phone -without "bye"!- and I slept like never before!

--------------------------------------------------------------

To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

--------------------------------------------------------------

Mie Mie

2009-09-20T18:21:00.000-07:00

عيدكم مبارك وكل عام والجميع بخير
:)

Randomly Randoms :**

2009-09-15T18:20:00.000-07:00

Morning Shift

i hate morning shift, i hate morning shift, i hate morning shift, and i hate morining shift.
Did i make myself clear about work morning shift in Ramadan?! I don't think so!!! :@
I HATE MORNING SHIFT!!!
that's better :D

The way you make mie ... swaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaY !

I am having a serious problem in forgetting and misplacing my things, mostly important things!
What would you if you lost your flash memory?! that doesn't only include family, friends, and your 500 + pictures, but also your Masters Studys projects and essays?!

Well, i broke down!

Shall I cry on the pictures that each one carrys a memory?!
Or my projects that holds my efforts and witness my success?!

Yes... I Broke Down!

And after cursing my luck -which isn't always bad. But I curse it when I am mad- i realize i have two choices:

A. Keep on crying and cursing?!
B. Get dressed and go to Fayouna's Ghabga?!

Few minutes of calm tears and cries passed; i heard a voice saying: "nothing is worth it! we will all end up dying and no one will care about your pics or projects"

As scary as it sounded; as funny! So i laughed ironically at what is going on with mie, and decided to...

Wash my teary red face, wear my training, turn my car on and drive to the salon to get my hair done for the Ghabga!

Got back home, dressed up, make up and head to Fayoun's place where I had so much fun!! Thanks Fayoun :*

All that happened while my parents and sisters shock from my quick and immediate mood swang!

I still don't know where or how did the flash disapear! But I have faith and sure I will find it sooner or later Enshallah, If not then it is "5era"

اللهم يا جامع الناس في يوم لا ريب فيه، اجمعني بضالتي يا رزاق يا كريم ... اللهم آمين

Enshallah Akbar t5aliny ANAAAAM!

I am in the middle of Room Renovation, and leading a Che Guevara Revolution -as a special person named it- in our house.

Onward, i will refer to renovation as RENO. and revolution as REVO.

Let mie introduce my partner in the renovation and revolution (RENO. & REVO.) ... Akbar - najar irany! Thanks to Her Highness Norah, who introduced him to mie and saved my RENO. & REVO. plans

He started with the huge closet that i hate the most in my room, smoothly and nicely he got rid of it :) Tomorrow he will bring a painter to paint my room... My RENO. & REVO. plans are successfully working, and Dad is successfully surrendering for them :D

What's the problem then?!

ABY ANAM! Since Akbar, my partner, started his part of the plan.. i never slept or took a nap! Ya3nee el youm elly kasar my closet, i had to go to work earlier.
Today, we are holding an urgent meeting to discuss the color of my room... ay sa3a?! He didn't define, but said "mn talata ns ela arba ana akun mawjod" LOL "i will pass by between 3.30 to 4PM"

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA5 ! it is my nap time! 7aram 3alik ya akbar! Aby anam!!!
No one said that RENO. & REVO. success comes easy; there are fights and blood and injuries...

But it all ends up great! When I see my room decorated the way I want it to be not the way forced on mie!

Twitter ... Twitt Mie

I am loving twitter, it is cute :D But I still don't know how to utilize all its benefits! I created the account, twitted, followed, and got followers... Still I have a feeling it is beyond that:
How can i join a discussion?! In fact how can I know what are the latest discussions?!
Any tips?!

Ramadan ,,, I love you but I am sorry!

For the first time in my life, i want Ramadan to end! I love fasting, I barely feel hungrey or tired, I love the spiritual sence, I love Ramadan ... But I hate:

1. Smoking people who don't smoke while fasting and they put all their anger out on anything! e.g. my dad! OFFFFFFF!!! you can't talk to him before fo6or, shabriit!!

2. TRAFFIC TRAFFIC TRAFFIC and endless TRAFFIC! WHY?! Can someone explain why it is so crowded all time during the day and night in Ramadan!? All streets are blocked! policemen are dorks, and people drive like porks!
WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?!

3. Morning shifts! My boss changed my working shifts from afternon to morning :( and I hate morning shifts!

4. Crowd of series! what shall i watch?! all the good things are broadcasted at wrong time! I finally settle on فنجان الدم and I love Jamal Sleman!!! adry sury bs KEFY! ;p

Good question: why did I become EXTRA sensitive since Ramadan begun?! i don't stand a joke, arrgument, comment, critise... 3ala 6ool my tears fall and there is a 90% of a breakdown!! I have been like this since this Ramadan and I have no idea why!? Can someone explain?!
In the end; I would like to say for the occasion of el 3ashr el awakher...

اللهم اعتق رقابنا واهلنا وذريتنا واخواننا المسلمين والمسلمات، الاحياء منهم والاموات، من نار جهنم وسوء العذاب
وتقبل طاعاتنا وعباداتنا وصالح اعمالنا
وارحمنا واغفرلنا واستر علينا وارزقنا من حيث شئت
فاتك انت الرحمن الغفور الستار الرزاق
واسكنا الجنة والفردوس الاعلى
اللهم امين

Mie Mie

The Chemistry of Lost Souls

2009-08-30T18:19:00.000-07:00

The Definition

Soul is the spiritual or immaterial part of a living being, often regarded as eternal. It is usually thought to consist of one's consciousness and personality, and can be synonymous with the spirit, mind or self. (Encyclopædia Britannica. 2008. Retrieved November 12, 2008.) WIKI

Lost is -most accurate definition- Unable to find one's way (http://www.thefreedictionary.com/lost)

Lost Soul is -created by my humble analysis- is When your eternal living part is stuck in between two paths, unable to go back to where is was, and unable to find the way to move forward!!!

The Saga

How sad can one be when his soul is lost?!
yet how FOOL can one be when denying the soul lost?!

I believe all our souls are lost, between keeping up with traditions, most are useless and shamful, while the useful ones are slowly fading away!

Between baring with the political, economical, sportal -adry TYPO bs ertejal el qaseda ma6loob- and social turn down we all know, feel, sense, hear, and lately drink!

Baring with the educational, cultural, ethical ... endless BLEEDING!

Our souls are lost between earning for freedom yet captured by Islamicasim which is relating every single Atom to a religion they call Islam; and Islam is WAY to far from what they call!

Captured by the materialistic world we drag ourselves into!

Our souls are lost and sinking in the dirtiest way I have ever seen. Because some people don't know what's going to them and can't realize how dangerous it is to have a generation without a SOUL!

We have a lost soul when we position someone as an idol, forgetting that he/she are human beings and have their own flows!

And for sure, our souls are lost because we are far away from the most essential thing in ones life; a good, close relationship with our Creator

The Case

I know two deeply lost souls.
A guy who lost his way of getting good education, a stable family, a wise friend, a decent job.
A girl who lost her way in identifying her self between two contradictive parents; a libral mother and a conservative father.

Both lost their ways in realizing what is right for them...
Both isolated themselves from theis coas soicties...
Both were seeking for an idolistic IDOL...
And both denied the fact that they need help in finding the right way; even if the right path is right infront of their eyes!
Both were from two different places. But their insecurity brought them together.

They found in themselves what they both seek ... security
They started something they called "love" to maintain the state of security and satbility.

The Fear

The are not right for eachother
Two different socities
Two different cultures
Two different religion
Two different educational levels

One thing in common; they both have a lost soul

They don't care about their differences, as long as they are happy and living their day to the fullest!

They don't care about tomorrow
Or how bad this can turn out for both of them!

When I asked them: do you realize what you are doing?!
Both answered: Yes we know it is wrong
Mie wondered: then why do you keep on?!
Both hesitated then said: we don't know!

She and him are very ... out of reality

I am very worried for both,
when they wake up from their pink bubble and face the harsh reality; what will they do?!
How will they react to the fact that they are not meant to be at any chance!?

What can I do to assure less damage for both of them?!?!?

In the end...

When your soul is lost
and you know it is
even if you don't want to admit!
Try to keep it save
from deeper lose
which will become a deeper pain!
Thus, once your soul is bleeding from pain
it will be harder for you to pull it back together and
find its way... to a stable state!

P.S. (A Woman Torn Apart) will be out soon ;)

Mie Mie

Ramadan,,, blisses upon all :*

2009-08-20T18:18:00.000-07:00

في كل عام، يبدأ صراع رؤية هلال رمضان

في ناس تحلف انها شافته وتصوم العالم على هالاساس

وفي ناس اطالب باستخدام احدث الوسائل الفلكية لرؤية الهلال

Every year ... the Dilemma of "Ramadan Crescent" begins

Some people swear they saw it with there bare eyes; therefore an entire nation fast

Others demand the newest astrology techs and the scintific prove

واذا كنتوا بتصومون الجمعة او السبت او الاحد

مبارك عليكم الشهر الكريم جميعا

Whether you are fasting on Friday or Saturday or Sunday...

Happy Ramadan to Everyone

ولا تنسون قائمة الممنوعات قبل الفطور

And don't forget; the NO list before Al Maghreb prayers

قالوها الاولين: بعد العشا -او العشاء هيهي- افعل ما تشا

;)

Do all that; after 3esha

انشاء الله يكون رمضان خير وبركة على ديرتنا الحبيبة الكويت والعالم الاسلامي أجمع

وانشاء الله يبعد الشرعلى جميع الشعب الكويتي

الله يهَدي ويهْدي النفوس

آمييييييييييييييييييييييييييييييييييييييييييييييييييييين

Enshallah it is a blissful month to Kuwait, and all the Islamic nations.

And Enshallah it is a blissful and peaceful month upon all Kuwaitis - Allah yhady oo yahdy el nofous

Amin

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 9

2009-08-18T18:17:00.000-07:00

as promised ... enjoy :*

_______________________________________________

"la mafeny chay... bs hathy my friend from work replied to my msg"

Okik deal! See you tomorrow and take care :* << style="color: rgb(0, 204, 204);">"oh ok"

We got into Sultan Centre Salmiya in less than 10 mintues; i love Kuwait when it is not crowded! Oh it was Sunday afterall; second day of the week :)

I did my grocery and needs shopping and before i went to pay

"5alty emshay nsawer upstairs -- fawry"

"ambieh! shayfa ashkalna?!?!?!?"

"ee 7ada 3aba6,, plzzzzzzzz" and gave me a puppy eyes! Kalba so cute!

"okaay emshay"

we went upstair and took stupid 5 pics with the express photo machine that was in Sultan 2nd floor. We then paid my things and went to Johnny Rockets

As we entred the resturant, it wasn't that crowded; few Americans and few I guess Kuwaitis. I felt someone's gaze on me, i couldn't focus because my mobile was ringing and it was A7mad

"Alo?"

"wensh?!"

We sat in one of the tables facing the bar and said "bat3asha bara ma3 Rawan" coldly

"leish el nafsiya?!"

"mafeny chay... bs a5ales adeg! Bye"

"Mashy!!!" and he hanged up

just when i hanged the phone

dropped it in my bag

turned my face up

then i

"OH SHIT!" i whispered trying to hide my RED face

"shenu?! meno?!" Rawan turned her face to the bar and behind her

"ya bgara don't look around! i saw someone"

"and why are you so nervous?!"

"he ... he is a guy kan la7egna the other day in Sharq bs ma3a6ita wayeh!"

"mmmm! tell me which one?!"

"the one wearing a gray sweater"

she pretended to get something out of her bag and managed -God knows how- to sneak a look at him

"OH MY GOD! 7ada yshaweg 5alty!!"

"chubay dont say 5alty la ysma3!!"

"why do you care?!"

do i ?!

"madriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!" i noticed my stupid childish reaction and decided to go back to normal as if nothing matters ... right?!

"5alena na6lb bser3a oo nakel oo ne6la3! aslan it is getting late!" i said

"it's 15 minutes to 8!!! ay late?!" Rawan complained

"6ylbay oo entay sakta! Tara mara thanyna ma a6l3sh ma3ay!!" i demaned using the AUNT POWER ;p

"FINE!"

He kept his eyes on ... me

He looked at me like there was no one in the room but ... me

He ... made something tickel deep in ... me

"weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeein ser7atay!!??" Rawan intruppted my thoughts

"HAA.... shtabin taklin?!"

"ana 6elabt oo el rayal sarla sa3a wagf na6rsh!"

i didnt realize the waiter was standing next to our table!

"Oh... i will have , i guess The Original and coke"

"with ice mam?!" the waiter asked

"yes please"

"Ok mam i will repeat your order; one Route 66 no onion and The Original and fries with cheese, two cokes"

"yes... thanks" Rawan said

"sh7aga fries with cheese?!"

"Cause I am hungrey!!!"

the way she said hungrey made me laugh!

"yal faj3ana! hehe!"

He was with his friend sitting on the bar, fixxed his eyes and smiling at me. He seemed happy to see me; i guess.

UFF 3AWASH!! stop thinking about him!!! FOCUS FOCUS!

I looked at Rawan and wanted to start a coversation while he was sipping his coke and talking with his friend ,, and this never ending smile on his face !! CHARMING

"meta emte7anatkoum?!" i know it is a silly question but ... WHAT CAN I DO?!?!?

"el finals?!"

"ee ?!"

" after new year; 3e6la then emte7anat! malat!!"

" yeah it sucks sa7?! "

"7ada! MMM so?!"

"sO what?!"

"i guess, for some reason, A7mad bothered you... Sa7?!"

Oh! By the way; Rawan has this sixth sence ... freakiya!

"why are you asking?!"

"because I am reading this love book, and it says that a woman could never think of another man unless her man isn't fulfilling her... what do you think?!"

"And what makes you think i am not fulfilled 3ala gultsh?!"

"you are blushing everytime you look at this annonymous guy; so obvious you have something for him OR something pushed you to feel this way!"

"Where on earth did you learn all these pschological stuff?!"

"SEE! you didnt pay attention with mie! i told you from a book i am reading?!"

"what's the name of the book?!"

"Love ... A Different Halo!" she said with confidence

"Ya salam!? never heard of it!"

"that is because ... i wrote it!?"

"na3am?!"

"hehe there is no such book! i was making it up to grab your attention!"

"Wallah shaklsh 3ashga oo rathya tetarfen!!! hain! malsh ela 5altsh!!!"

"latguliny 5altsh ... layesme3sh! hehe" she teased me

"Here you go mam! cheese fries & The Original" the waiter put down the plates

"where is my Route 66 and drinks???" Rawan asked

"comin' mam"

10 minutes later; he brought Rawan's burger and our drinks. We were eating while talking about random things... Yes! i was trying to distract myself from ... Him

Suddenly, as we were about to finish eating, his friend turned around and looked at the me! He -my charm- hit his friend on his shoulder and told him something with an angrey face expression! I guess he said "shaku e6ali3ha" hehe!!

I blushed and immediatley told Rawan "ask for the check, let's leave!" checking my watch, it was 8:45 PM

"Okay" she turned at the waiteress behind the bar and said "check please"

While waiting for them to bring back the change, he got of his chair, passed next to our table, giving me a smile with a LOOK and head toward the W/C

"ambiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiieh! 7ada yaby yraqmsh!!!" Rawan whispered

Rawan was facing the W/C while i gave it my back; she said he was standing there waiting!

"UFF!!! wein el %$^# el bajy!!!" I got really nervous

few second later; the waiter came with tha change. As soon as I got them, left some tips, we grabbed our bags and got out as quick as ........... I can!!!

As soon as we left ...

"LEL7IN MADEFA3T???" I was shocked! I gave him cash to pay and he just sat there like DUH!

"OLLA Shfeik me3tefs???"

"ent '3aby!!! ana baru7 waraha, 5ales oo el7agny!"

and before Mish3al say a word; i left the place trying to catch ... HER!!!

"a7s seda maseda!" Rawan said while we were walk... I mean jogging toward my car

"ba3din te7al6may! walk faster!" I said

"I AM!!!"

We reached my car which I parked below Macdo. since it was empty; open the doors, Rawan got in as I was about to open my door when I felt someone's hand on my door!

I tried to fake a mean tone pretending not to freak out "ent mateste7y????"

"asef ana.."

"wa5er 2edk 3an sayarty!"

"enzain bs lazem tesm3eny!!"

"ent shayefha 3adla shakly jedam el nas!!?? MA3ENDK 5AWAT T5AAF 3ALIHOM!?" OUCH! that hurts!!

His face changed, moved away, took a deep breath and looked directly into my eyes

"asef"

THAT JUST ... 3AWAR GALBY! SO Sinser

I didn't say a word, i couldn't! I got into my car, turned it on and drove away. He was still standing in his place; emotionless!

"maby wla kilma aw ta3liq! oo maby a7ad y3aref OK??" I told Rawan in a very mean way

"enshallah" She could see I was pissed; I don't know why I was!!!

The drive was awckwardly silent; I dropped Rawan at her home in Khaldiya when she said

"maskoura 3al 6al3a,, I had fun" gave me a smile, i smiled back as she slamed the car door.

I drove home and still speeachless from what happened! I wasn't in the mood of talking with Maryoom, garga isn't what I need right now!

I finally got home, greeted mum & dad, Ghazy wasn't home, went to my room, prepared what I will for tomorrow, washed and changed... Then dived into my bed

Composing Text MSG

Ana wesalt el beit, ga3ed?

** @*$ Calling **

why cant you answer by a msg?? ymkn ana ga3da ma3 ahly!!!

i answered with "hmmmm"

"nemtay??" he said with a temper rising voice

"la bs mnsad7a oo 7ady bnam"

"Leish ma dagitay?"

"cz it was a long day" I lied ; i didn't want to talk to him

"ra7 a3eed el su2al mara wa7da oo latchathbin 3alay"

Here we go again!

"LEISH MA DAGITAY 3ALAY 6OL EL YOUM??"

Uff wagta al7in... WAGTAH?!!!!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 8

2009-08-18T18:16:00.000-07:00

Because I have away for awhile; i decided to write an extra long post and PART 9 will be out soon too :*
I am inroducing new charecters here. And because it is long, i seperated the part with places e.g. WORK .. HOME .. ROOM .. CAR so no one will get confused

Thanks for your support and paitence ;***

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

:: WORK ::

I arrived at work wearing a baig trouser, a brown silk shirt, a shifon tiger printed scarf and a baig jacket, brown heels, and my fav LV bag. Fresh light make up: sun block, mascara, blusher and a lip gloss.

I went to my office to find only Marwa sitting doing some God knows what on her computer, pretneding to be busy, beacuse there is nothing to do at 7:40 am! Right?!?

"Saba7 el 5eir" I said as i was sitting and turning on my computer

"Saba7 el noor" Marwa said gazing me

Since I knew she won't give me any work til '9ary -my anonymous boss- comes back, i decided to check on my email and read some articles on the internet -thank God we had it!

30 min later, with silence and non stop gazing from Marwa, Nahed came in wearing all the brightest colors in what we can call "WINTER in KUWAIT" AKA December!

"Eslam 3aLikoum!" Nahed said with a cheerful smile

finally i heared your voice

"Wa 3alikom el Salam" i said smiling

"entay esh7aga met2a5ra?!" Marwa asked her

"reday el salam bel awal!!"
"lama edawmin 3adel, ared el salam! esh7aga met2a5ra?! La Rayel, La 3yal, La 3amat 3ein!! LEISH MET2a5RA?!?!?"

"5alit 3amat el 3ein 7agsh! gmt met2a5ra oo za7ma el shuware3! weih kelateny begshoury shfeeesh!?!" it was obvious that Nahed was pissed and embareesed from two facts: 1) Marwa's rudness 2) Embaressing her infront of me!

"EEEH! manaby el yidida ta7seb ena el wath3 samarda7a fee edaratna! el estath '9ary wayed ra7 yet'thayag etha 3eraf ena el qedam oo el yedad yet2a5roun!"

NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA3AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM

"etha qasdsh ana, fa ana ma at2a5er 7eta mu bs el edara samarda7a, etha el Hay2a eb koborha samarda7a ana ma at2a5er! oo ba3din (el ydida) 3ndaha esm ohwa 3AYSHA oo etha mu 3ajbsh gulily 3AWASHA, bs latekalmin 3any bse'3at el '3ayeb aw cheny nakera!"

and before she say a word

"Oo lil 3elm etha shefteny te2a5art aw gasart fy she'3ely elly aslan ma adry shenu ohwa, mu entay t7asbiny, entay bs neqlay el kalam 7ag el muder oo ohwa yetsaraf! ENTAY MU MUDERTY!!" I said

i know it is my second day of work, lesa ben2ul YA HADY, but the idea of her wanting to tease or treat me the way she does with Nahed is completley unacceptable! I had to draw CLEAR lines from the very begining!

Nahed was stunned! she actually gave me an admiring smile. While Marwa was shocked and just said "ana ma aby akaber el mawthoo3 -- lama 2eyee el estath '9ary ra7 ykun lah kalam ma3ash!"

"oo hatha ely ana abieh!" i replied looking stright in her eyes then turned at Nahed and said "e5et Nahed, etha tabin asa3dsh bchay.. ana 7ather"

Nahed and Marwa eyes POPPED and jaws DROPPED!

"Enshallah 7abibty mashkura!" Nahed said with the widest smile ever!

"5anga!" suddnely Marwa said and went out the room!

I smiled and returned to my web surffing when Nahed said "ya 3omry, feta7tay 3ala nafcsh bab!"

"Leish?!"

"Marwa, wayed wasla oo shareya, ana asket 3anha 3ashan may7ushny mnha char!"

"ana elly ma ye7termny ma a7terma lu kan ra2es el Hay2a! oo etha ehya wasla oo foog, Rabsh mawjoud oo mayertha 3al thelm oo foog kel thalem enshallah" i said with confidence

I got this strength from my dad, though we are not close, but he is 3esamy! Kawan nafsa eb nafsa and he did it all alone oo btwafeg mn Rab el 3alamin... Things as he sees it are either BLACK or WHITE, meaning, either RIGHT or ... WRONG!

"Mashallah 3alish, ana mn sheftesh 3eraft ensh qaweya oo Marwa mara7 tegdar 3alish" she continued "3al 3umum, ana 7abet a7athrsh... oo ra7 a3almsh cham sha'3la la2ena '9ary emasek el she'3el kela 7ag Marwa, ana asawee el taqarer oo Marwa traje3ha gabel la '9ary yshufha"

"fehamt" i said

"al7in ra7 a3almsh 3al taqarer el awaliya oo 5asa taqarer el shu2un el zera3iya, ya3nee mazare3, arathy oo chethy.. 3ashan ana amseq el Samakiya, oo entay el Zera3a oo Marwa ely maskita el shu2un el edariya oo muraja3at taqarerna... enzain?!" she asked smilling

"Enzain" i smiled back

Another dump report i worked on for an hour then Nahed revised it and corrected what I missed.

Marwa was not to be seen anywhere! A7SAN ;)

"Mashallah 3alish! mu wayed a56a2"

"Hehe, entay 2ustatha tfahmin 3adel"

"la eshda3wa 2ustatha! bs 3einy 3alish barda"

"shukran.. mumkn break?!"

"ee 6ab3an" she smiled as I pushed away my chair and left the office

I wanted to see Saja. Yesterday's conversation with A7mad didnt shade away!! I had a weired feeling about ... THEM!

KNOCK KNOCK

"ahlan ahlan!" looking georgous with a silk pony tail, a red-wine lipstick color and a thick eyeliner

"hala fesh, shlounsh?!"

"zaina, shensh 6awaltay el yum lein yeteny?! wayed she'3el?"

"la2, bs Nahed 3alematny a dump report that i worked on it"

"and where was Marwa?!"

"hehe I'm glad you asked!"

I told Saja the morning movie that happened with Marwa...

"HAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!" she laughed her heart out! "Zain tsawein feha! la2ena mayenfa3 ma3aha ela chethy! oo ma3alsh mn kalam Nahed, '9ary rayal oo 3aref el wath3 and lay3a chabda mn Marwa oo swalifha"

"yeebain lama 2eyee..."

"ee sa7" she gave me a weired smile

"shefesh chethy e6al3eny" i was faking a smile that looked very obvious as a YELLOW one

"salamtsh, bs el youm me7lawa akthar mn ams" she said

"3younsh el 7elwa"

7ady aby a3aref shenu el wathe3 bensh oo benah! bs madry shloun!!!

She gave me a smile and we started random talks.... and time passed as i excused myself and went back to the office

The remaining of the day: Marwa and I exchanged discusted gazes and Nahed gave me another dump report and I worked on it

I went toward my car when I heard a voice from the back

"3awash..."

I turned around to see Saja walking toward me

"Amray?!"

"shraysh neltegy 3ala youm nshrab coffee?! I really want to get to know you outside work"

"Akid! me to!" i said excitly Yat mn Allah!!!

"shufay nafcsh oo let me know; ana dayman fathya ela hal weekend cz we might go to chalieh"

UFFFFFFFFFFFF THIS CHALIEH! :@

"a7san ba3ad! ana ma7eb 6al3at el weekend, kel mukan za7ma!" I said

"deal! an6er your call today" she said, kissed my cheeks and left to her car

Turned on my car, played Rwished's (Methel ma gelt) song and drove home

:: HOME ::

I got home and immediatly went to the dinning room where my dad and mom were just about to eat. Kissed their forehead and sat infront of mom dince dad sits on the front-head of the table.

"Yuba 3a6iny el daqus"

"tefathal"

"shlun el she'3el yuba?"

"zain el 7amdila"

"shufay ya yuba, el 7ayat feha el zain w el shaain, entay ra7 tsadfen b7ayatsh ashkal oo anwa3 mn el bashar.. w medan el she'3el '3eir medan el derasa"

i was listening carefully while he was pouring Daqus on the rice then he looked stright into my eyes and said "mumkn tensadmin mn waqe3 el 3amel, mu ely entay tabina... lakin dayman tethakeray el 9aber mefta7 el faraj, oo 6awlay balsh 3al nas ela el ehanat mayensket 3anh; 7ata etha mudersh hansh mataskteen! Allah el '3any.. sem3atay yuba?"

"7ather yuba" then i continued eating

We finished our lunch and head to the living room where my brother Ghazy just arrived in.

************************************************************************************

>> okay, here are some key features of my family <<

I am the youngest child of my family.

I have 6 sibling; 3 brothers (Jassim, Fawaz, Ghazy) and 3 sisters (Muthy, She5a, Dana) and me all together 7 :)

S3ud (45 yrs) is married to my cousin Lamya and have 4 children

Fawaz (40yrs) is married to Souha - typical family arrangment - and have 2 children

Hesa is my eldest sister (44 yrs) is married to Othman and have 4 children

She5a (42 yrs) is married to 3bdallah and have 2 children

Dana (35 yrs) married to M7amad and only have one baby girl (3 yrs) and pregnant with her second baby

Ghazy (30 yrs) not married and i dont think he is intending to!

and me .. 3awash -a5er el 3anqud and i guess by mistake ;pPp

I won't go through all my nighou and nises - because they are 13 and one on the way ;) - but I love Rawan (15 yrs) bnt e5ty Hesa (retired) ... aslan i love all Hesa's children cz she is my second mother!

She5a (doctor) was always in her bubble and very practical; she married someone who is excatly the same... We only see her in our weekly gatherings and her kids are geeks just like her ;p

Dana (muhandesa me3mariya) ... what can i say about the wildest sister!!?? She kept on falling in love with the wrong guys! Ya mu mn nwa5ethna, ya mu kuwaitiin, ya mu nafs mustawaha el ta3limy, or something very weired!!! hehe Mom went crazy from Dana and she tried hard to hook her up in arranged marriages with any guy from the extended family -- and Dana, akeed refused "ana matzawaj nafs yadety oo Omy!" ;p Until one day; an anonymous lady called my mom and asked to propose for Dana. Dana -on the other side- didn't know who is that guy and agreed to see him only because he is not family! To everyone's surprise; she said YES and they got married in less that 2 months! Nseiib!

Ghazy (works in wezarat el 5arijiya) ... Because my brothers were too busy to take of me, they assigned Ghazy for the job! They looked at me as a spoiled brat and someone must draw my limits! Yes that was Ghazy's job, official spokesperon of Jassim and Fawaz! Kan rayal 3alay ana, but when it comes to important family cases or decisions, y7e6una sefer 3al shemal and they dont his opinion on anything! Things were like that until i reached my second year at University. He suddenly realized what he was doing was wrong, and that's when we became really good friends :)

S3ud and Fawaz are the meanest creatures on earth! They stick their noses in everything... A typical solider type! S3ud is 3aqeed bel jesh while Fawaz is Mu7aqeq bel shur6a! UFF u can imagine how mean, sick and suspicious both are! As well as their wives and children!

Mom and Dad married after a vecious love story - i dont know why! - both believe in love is the core of every good thing in life and only by love they can face any problem ahead <<>

That was a quick tour for my family; just to clear things up :)

************************************************************************************

>> Back to story <<

"Yuma te'3adiet?!"

"EE yuma weya el rabi3"

Mom was pouring some tea to dad as he said "erked ya sbay! sh6ulk oo sh3rthek tru7 takel ma3 rab3ik mu ahalik!!"

"Ya bu S3ud ba3ad el rabe3 3zmuny aredhoum?! 7elwa b7agik ygulun welda yred el 3azayem!?"

My dad just stared at him and nodded his head

"weeih ya bu S3ud oo weldk saj! 5ala yestanis bdenyetah... Bs ana aby yarged mn soub thany" and she gave him a concerned look

"ana baru7 anam... tamrun 3ala chay?!"

Ghazy was heading to the stairs to his room when mom said "Yuma 3awash, maku banouta 7elwa nzawejha Ghazy?!"

He stopped, turned at me and gave me a GAZE!

"YUMA! 5ara3teny! lu sej aku wa7da fy bally bahawen mn hal 5aza!!!" I said seriously I was scared!

"ya3nee aku?!" my mum excitedly asked

"la yuma maku!" i smiled "oo etha feih entay awal wa7da agulsh"

"A3almsh! tesb7un 3ala 5eir!!!" Ghazy went to his room

Dad was drinking his tea when mum started her famous complainings about Ghazy; I excused myself to have my nap too.

:: My Room ::

Text msg composed::

Maryoomty,, mumkn ma taz3jeny?! I had a very long day and i need energy to tell you all about it ;*

Text msg composed Ana ta3bana oo banam, akalmk bs ag3ad

I changed the mobile status into Silent and slept so deeply after this long day at work!

"Na3am???" i said in a heavy voice

"5alty 3awash gumay!!!"

OOH! hatha sout Rawoon! i looked at my watch it was 5:30 PM "deshay..."

She opened the door to see her zoomby aunt -me ;p- laying on bed and barly moving!!

"Salam 5alty el hola!"

"chuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuub!!!"

she sat on the edge of my bed "shyayebkoum?!"

"Omy galat dam ga3din fathyen gumaw 5anzur yadatkom oo yadkom"

"el beit fy Ghazy oo 3awash ba3ad!!"

she laughed and said "ee okay you are included bel 7esba!"

I stretched my hands and said "shenu a5er el a5bar el 3a6ifiya?!"

"hehe maku!" Rawan blushed

I placed on hand on my face while stretching the other "Ollaaaaaaaaaa ya entay chathaba!!!"

"WALLAH SEJ!!!" she continued "ana lel7in mu3jaba eb Mi7sn weld 5alty Hend"

"Mi7sen weld 5alty Hend" i said sarcasticly "mn zena!!! Aw mn zein OMA!!! 6el3aw bara el 3ayla!!! 5alaw dam ydid ydesh feha! Hatha Mi7sen aslan mayadree 3an hawa darsh oo yserlina mn b3ed... LEISH EL MAGATHA???!!!"

"ya3nee mn wein bashufly a7ad thany?! hathela nshufhoum byam3atna oo rabyin ma3ahoum! e7na mu dashen medars 5asa net3araf feha 3ala a7ad yswa! entay meta 7abitay?! Mu lama dashetay el jam3a and you met guys then choosed?!"

"Allah kareem!" i was thrilled with this girl's logical ... logic "enzain, gumay 5alena nanzel ta7at"

"okay bs shlun Mr.LOVA LOVA?!"

I bursted from laughing!

"Zain... yallah emshaaaay!!"

we went down to see Mom, Hesa, her other 3 kids: Rashed (12 yrs), Ranad and Rshood (10 yrs TWINS) sitting in the living room

Ranad and Rshood kissed me and went to the other Hall room to play while Rashed only shake hand me then went to Ghazy's room.

"el salam 3alikom Om R's" kissing Hesa's cheeks

"wa 3alikm el salam" kissing me back as she sat on the sofa "entay matyuzin?! shenu Om R's"

Rawan sat next to mum while I sat next to Hesa and said "Entay kel 3yalsh b7arf el R... oo kelhum a7ebhoum! mayser agulsh Om Rashed oo bekrsh Rawan, mayser agulsh Om Rawan oo 3ndsh walad, oo ham mayseer nensa twin el 5a6i2a" i laughed

"chubay! 5a6i2a bwayhesh! 7esbalsh kel el yahal methlsh?! yaya bel wagt el thaye3??!!" Hesa joked

"CHUBAW ENTAW EL ATHNIN!" mum said

we all laughed

"shlun dawamsh?!" Hesa asked

"6umasha, el yum metnajra ma3 wa7da!" i said

"HAW ya 7afeth! el yum Obsh sa2lsh geltela maku chay!! leish etchathbin?!" Mum asked concerned

"Waaay!! Yoomaa ya3ny agul 7ag oboy 3an nejrat 7areem?! Entay masaweteha!!"

"enzain leish methawsha?! shelsafa?!" Hesa cuiriously asked

"Allah ysalmsh aku wa7da ma3ay bel qesm esmha Marwa .... " i told her all about the situation with Marwa and Nahed's reaction and advice

Mum said "Malat 3aliha! mn ta7seb 3umerha?! bs ya mama el saber zain"

"el yum Oboy shgal?! 6awlay balsh 3al nas ela el ehanat mayensket 3anh; 7ata etha mudersh hansh mataskteen! Allah el '3any ... Sa7 kalama???"

My mum nodded

"Yuma! Oboy chena yadree ena el yum sayer film ma3ash bel dawam!!" Hesa was shocked

"ee te5ayelay! 7ada 5ara3ny! Bs a7la chay Om S3ud tabiny adawer 3ala 3arus 7ag Ghaziyo! hehe"

"ma asadeg!" Hesa turned on Mum and said "mn sejsh!? hatha weldsh mara7 yetzawaj 6ul ma2entay t7enin 3alih!!"

"EE mn sejy! oo batem a7en lein yetzawaj!!" Mum was some how pissed

"Yuma Muthy a5af 5aly y7ebla wa7da oo mu gayelkm" Rawan said innocently

Mum and Hesa eyes popped out .. HARD!

I laughed hillariously!

"way3a!! entay mn wein t3arfin hal 7achy?!" Hesa hit Rawan - who was sitting next to mum - with a cochin

"oo leish ma3arf?! ana mu yahel!"

"yahel oo seten yahel ba3ad!"

"BAS!! yayeen tehaweshun 3endy!!??" Mum yelled

I kept on laughing

"Hesa, gumay e5thay 3yalsh oo ma3 el salama! ru7aw tehaweshaw fee betkoum! yanantuny!" Mum got of her seat and was heading to the kitchen

"Yooomaaa ... Yoomaaaa" Hesa yelled at mum, who ignored her, looked at Rawan and said "ana a3almsh ya bnt Othman!!!" and followed mum

"7adesh 6umasha!" i looked at Rawan and laughed

"leeeeeeeeeeeeeeish me7taren mn el sej?! i said MAY BE!!" she said "hehe ymkn Omy Muthy mataby 5aly Ghazy ye7eb wa7da 3ala kefa"

"et-hagein?!" i wincked at her

"7adsh tadrin etha ohwa y7eb a7ad or not!! ... ygulsh kel chay" she grabed the remote control and chaged the channel

"KTV ya3nee dather eshwaya 3aliha! leish ma3endkum ART?!?!?"

"ana 3endy foug oo Ghazy ba3ad; yadsh y7eb kel chay traditional"

"I see" she switched to MBC they had an Arabic series

We were watching the show and after 30 min Rawan said "5alty 3awash, gumay ne6la3"

i looked at her -not in the mood - and said "wein balah?!"

"madry ay mukan!! thaag 5elgy!"

i felt bad for her "tru7in Sultan Centre Salmiya?! I need to get some stuff then nmur Johnny elly yam el Fanar for dinner"

"EE!! YALLAH PLZ" Rawan happily said

I dialed the kitchen extention number and told mum we are going to Sultan Centre then have dinner

"ana aweslha el beit" i told mum through the phone

"5alas omha tgul enzain.. deraw balkom" mum said

it was 6:30 PM when i realized i left my mobile up and didnt check it! I told Rawan to wait for me as i change in less than 10 minutes.

I got to my room, checked my mobile and found

3 misscalls from Maryoom

4 msgs

"ok ... 7ata ana 3endy salfa !! noum el 3afya "

"3ala ra7tsh!"

"kel hatha noum!!! GOOOOOOOOOOMAY!"

"3awash shlounsh?!?! meta maw3edna?!"

I decided to call Maryoom when I leave the house, reply to Saja and msg A7mad -ly al7in maly 5elga!!

I wore a baggy jeans and a long sleves black t-shirt with a back cab and my did a pony tail with my hair, very casual.

Rawan was wearing a bagy black jeans and a colored shirt with her natural wavy hair down.

We got into my car, and drove to Salmiya

:: My Car ::

"ba7e6 CD mn 3ndy" Rawan said

"okay, bs a5als my call and do what ever you want"

"Mr. LOVA LOVA?!" she teased

as i was dialing Maryoom's no. i said "SHAGGY :p"

She call me Mr. Boombastic say me fantastic, touch me on me buttshe say I'm Mr. Ro...mantic

We sang along when...

"KEL HATHA NAYMA?!?!?" Maryoom screamed in my ears!

"ALO! WAY3AA !! Gemt mn zeman bs Hesa yatna ma3 3ayalha oo al7in ray7a agz m3 Rawan"

"ya salaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaam!!! wein enshallah?!"

"Sultan Centre Salmiya oo 3gub 3asha eb Johnny"

"5iyana!!! 3ayal mu fathya tgulin salftsh sa7?!"

Honestly... i was bored from saying it 3 times aday!

"ee ... beliel agulsh oo tgulinly"

"enziiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin, yalla estansay ya a7san 5ala bel dinya HAHAHA" she teased

"chub! bye"

"bye"

i just hanged the phone when Rawan inserted her CD and played an English song; this girl is so into HIP HOP than anyone else I ever knew

Text message Composed

"ana ray7a el jam3iya ayeeb a'3rath 7ag Omy ma3 Rawan, akalmik lama ard"

"Hiii Saja shlounsh?! shraysh nru7 Starboucs Sharq bachr 7azat el ma'3arb?!"

Few minutes later

One New Messaged recieved

"Shfeesh??"

---------------------------------

To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

---------------------------------

Mie Mie

إنا لله وإنا إليه راجعون

2009-08-16T18:15:00.000-07:00

I was going to post the new part of "A Woman Torn Apart" But because of the Jahra tragedy and in solidarity with other blogger; I will stop posting for three days.

And Please donate for the victims of the tragedy at the Kuwait Central Blood Bank...

مثل ما خيرنا دائما لغيرنا، خلينا نعطي خيرنا لأهل ديرتنا

الله يغفر لهم و يصبر اهلهم

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 7

2009-08-06T18:14:00.000-07:00

"enta mn wein 6ale3 ?? "

"ALO wa 3alaykom el salam shlounsh ?? Chethy el nas tred! yahodiya entay maku salam??"

"Ay salam ay kalam!! enta wenik la challeih la yam3a ??"

"ba3ad shensawy... last weekend re7t 7adag ma3 3bidan "

"oo shenu 9edtaw?!?!"

"hahaha ! daam okhosh ma3ana wla chay ... shedenya feish?? 5alastay jam3a 3adel" adree astahebel bs lazem !!

"7AMADIN OO WAY3A! ana met5arja mn 5 sinin oo sarly 4 snin asht'3el!!! enta sakraan?"

"ee saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa7! wein esh'3altay??"

"re7t el hay2a!"

"ay wa7da ?? estethmar ? "

" WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY !! yanantny!!!! shfeek fathy??""

"la2 .. estahbel ! eshloun el zera3a??"

"ashufiq ta3aref!!!"

"ee a3aref bs a6afrsh... mawelahtay 3ala 6farty?"

"kareeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh!"

"7ata ana walhan 3alesh Sajawee!! "

"mashkoor.. ent lil7in daloo3 obok??"

"ba3ad ma3enda '3ery! ta3alay ... egulun el wathe3 bel hay2a mas5ara, sej??"

"mu mas5ara kether ma 2uhwa m3afen!!!"

"wel banat haam m3afnin ??"

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOFF! mn sejik!? 9arly 4 sinin hnak oo el yoom awal mara ashoof wayh bnaya shaar7 !"

AAYWAA! hathy SHOSHTY!!

" laaa ! shloun?"

"3an6o6a, s'3ayroona oo 7adha cute!"

3ashan chethy a7ebha!

"3asa 5aleteha 3end el m3afnin? "

"Laaaaaaaaaaa! 3ala 6ool thaba6t-ha 3ashaan lay5arbounha oo serna friends!"

Ashwa! al7in te6amant!

"zain tsawein! 3ad etha 7elwa thab6ina okay?"

"7amadin"

"na3am?"

"chub oo eqlub wayheq"

"UKH! leish??? kel hatha 3ashan gelt thab6ina! laykun t7biny w ana madrt!?"

"weeeeeeeeeeei3!! aslan lu enta el rayal el wa7id bel denya ma afker feik!!! tawny wasla el beit oo 7ady day5a"

"oh! okay 3ayal ana bs knt dag a6aman"

"Wallah feik el 5eir,,, 3ad mu tga6i3na"

7ADA LA2!!! ;)

"akid Sajawii.. Yalla tamrin 3ala chay?"

Slaming the car door "la salmtik, salim 3ala Amal"

"Wasel, fy amaan ellah"

"ma3...."

He hanged the phone

Faj2etk ya A7mad!!! Bs kela ybayin ba3din etha sej dag tes2al aw brasek mawal thany!!!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 6

2009-08-04T18:14:00.000-07:00

Dedicated to New Bride & Fayoona ;** (two kisses for each)

------------------------------------------------------------------

"shfeek?!" i asked!!

I was shocked from his reaction; he never asked about "girls" i meet for the first time as much as "guys" if i ever mentioned and of course he knows every single girl i hang out with.

"Ana shfeny ma estaw3abt!" he was mumbling

"ma estaw3abt sheno?!" i'm losing my temper here!

"ensh teshta'3lin bel hay2a"

"ENTA BETGOLY SHFEEK AW BASAKER EL 5A6!" ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!!

"HATHY SAJAWEEEEEEEEEEEE!" he said with the happiest voice

"Na3am?! enta t3arefha?!" seriously now i am confused

"ee hathy tserly mn b3eed, mn soob yadety, oo kanaw yetyame3oon bchalleehna!"

i was too confused to say a word

He continued saying "okhoha entay t3arfena oo ohwa okho denya , esma 3abdallah -3biidan elly a7adeg ma3ah, 7adna close ma3ahoum oo Sajawee kanat 7adha 9eda gabel latroo7 Ma9er tadres, oo lama radat tameet ashufha byam3at el challeh from time to time"

Too much to comment on!

Awal chay: obviously they have a strong relationship since he calls he "Sajawee"
Thany chay: i know he has "female" relationships with his direct cousins but never the second or the third or the million cousin... shme3na Saja!?
Thaleth chay: he knew since i got accept in the Hay2a; that i was accepted in the Ha2a where Saja works... why he didnt bother telling me that he knew someone there?!

All these ideas and more clashed my head ... all were reflected in a complete silence!

He finally broke my silence and said "wein re7tay!? alooooo?!"

"ha! kany..."

"shfeesh?"

"sera7t"

"bsheno?!"

took a deep breath and said "bel kalam elly gelta"

"oo shely wesaltela?!"

"za7mat afkar, wayed as2ela... bs 6af; ana maly 5elg anaqsh el mawthoo3 so please dont ask anything, i will pop all the questions when i feel like doing that!" i couldnt let it all out, but he had to know that i was pissed and not in the mood!!!

He was shocked and said "okay 3ala ra7tsh.. but isn't it great that you are working with someone you like and I know from my family?!"

"A7MAD! I don't want to talk about it! MOMKEN!?" i yelled!

"okay okay!" he said "what are you up to?!"

"nothing .. bashof omy mage3at ma3aha mn ams, at3asha oo anam"

"Omsh mn ams mashefteeha oo welahtay 3aliha, 3ayal ana sarly 2 weeks masheftsh, ma welahtay 3alay?!" he asked

"mmmmm .. embala" UFF! I'm not in the mood!

"Meta ashoof el Qomar?!" flirting

URGH!!! Dont you hate it when they (guys) do something wrong, and they know it bothered you, then they try to play the "i miss you" or "i love you" roles thinking it will reduce your anger?!

7esbalah ana habla oo bansa!!!!

"Mu el youm; 7ady ta3bana mn el dawam wel wagt te2a5r, youm thany!" i said

"Meta ya3nee?!" starting his famous 7ANAH

"a7mad.. madry meta, i will try my best! enta tadry mu sahala el mawthoo3 and we are not in London nor the States! E7na bel Kuwait oo el 5e6wa ma7sooba eb alf!"

He was quit

"5aleny ashuf oo agulik, okay babe?!" i didnt want him to sense my rage, or think i didnt want to see him because i DONT want to see him!

"enzain" took a deep breath "3ala hawash, tabin chay?!"

"aby salmtk"

"bye"

WTH !! He never says "bye" but im sure he did because he knew i was pissed

"bye" and hang the phone

I got out of the bed, went to the toilet, took a shower to fresh and try to kick out Saja and A7mad idea from my head... wore a training, and head down stairs to find my mum and dad sitting in the living room

... Meanwhile ...

ADG aw MA ADG?! Enzain etha dagit shbagoulaha, sahrly shahrin mu shayefha oo madry 3anha... bs hathy 7abibty; BUT HOW?!

-------------------------------------------------------------

To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

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P. S. i know it is short, but i didnt want to keep you waiting any longer and i promise part 7 sooner than soon ;) :***

Mie Mie

2009-08-02T18:13:00.000-07:00

الغزو
القتل
الدمار

الشهداء والاسرى

الشرذمة .. الطاغية .. الحيوان وحاشيته من داخل العراق ودول الضد -واللي ناسي انذكره انهم: فلسطين واليمن وليبيا وتونس ومورتانيا والاردن

ولن ننسى

وتبونا ننسى؟! كل الجرائم التي ارتكبت بحق الشعب الكويتي، من النساء والاطفال وكبار السن ورجال الكويت؟! ولنفرض جدلا ان الشعب العراقي مسكين وليس له دخل بالغزو "الصدامي" كما يزعم البعض.. من نفذ جرائم القتل والسرقة والخطف والاغتصاب والاسر بكل وحشية وحقد واجرام ،، عناصر البعث ام الجيش اللذين هم من الشعب العراقي؟!
مطالبة تغير المسمى من الغزو "العراقي" الى الغزو "الصدامي" ... مرفوضة
مطالبة العفو والمسامحة والتنازل عن حقوقنا نحن الشعب الكويتي ... مرفوضة
مطالبة النسيان -علشان المصلحة السياسية والدبلوماسية الدينية وعمات العين- مرفوضة

19 سنة مرت على الغزو العراقي على الكويت ... لا يمكن لأحد ان يمسحها من ذاكرتنا

P.S. sorry for the delay; being busy is taking over my life lately
"A Woman Torn Apart -- 6" will be out soon ;**

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 5

2009-07-28T18:12:00.000-07:00

20 minutes later A soft -wayed daloo3- voice curiously asked "entay sham 3umrsh?!"

I looked at her shocked; her name is Marwa, with tiny body shape and a pointed nose, narrow eyes, thin lips, a mother of two and she is 26 -though she looks 36! She was wearing 3abaya and a thick 7ijab

"25" i was shocked from the approach, i mean what kind of a person who starts a conversation with how old are you?!! Weird!

"Shaklish 20" she said "esmy Marwa Al XX"
"wel ne3em , ana 3aysha Al XX" i replied - still feeling weird!
"Shga3da tsaweein?!" asking in a very rude tone!
"Soliter... ma3endy chay fa 7abit athaye3 waget!" i know rude but i dont handle (MALGOOF) type!
"EEEEH; e7na wedna neg3ad ma3ash oo n3almsh she'3el, laken el estaath '9ary 6elab mena gabel laay safer ena ma7ad y3alem el yedad chay!"
WTF!!!
"Na3am!! Leish?!"
"Madry!! Ana gelt agulsh 3ashan latgulin ma 3alimouny!"
The other lady was busy -or pretending to be!- running through dozen of files and papers on her desk. No comments did she share!

"OO ana bag3ad fathya leein 2eyee?!" I was mad but held my temper!
"ee.. she'3lay nafcsh bel Soliter" she was trying to be .. FUNNY!

"OK!" i moved the chair back got off it and head toward the door "yseir ash'3el nafsy oo atmasha bel qesem?!" I asked Marwa
"e5thay ra7tsh" with the nastiest smile i have ever seen!

I left the office pissed.. maly ela Saja!

...Marwa and Nahed...

"yal na7eesa! shfeesh 6afartay el bent" Nahed laughed while asking Marwa.

Nahed was 35, round face, wide brown eyes, single -never been married. A very naive and dump person!

"ma yazatly! sheftay shlabsa!! la oo bkel waqa7a tguly SOLITER!" Marwa said as she sat on her desk and eating nuts

"shfeeh lebsa ya 7afeth?! ban6aloon oo qames... Entay bs 5ayfa takel el jaw 3alish!" teasing Marwa

"la ya galbi, mu hal ashkal takel jawee! bs tadrin ma3 meno 6beegat?!"

"besmellah mn awalha! meno?!"

"Saja el {BEEEEEB}" Marwa replied angerly

"3ashaaaaaaaaaaaan chethy; el mafrooth ya sha6ra tyeebenha soobsh mu tkeeshenha mnsh!" Nahed was trying to advise Marwa

"6aa3 mno ytkalam! ana maby a7ad sooby! Agool, 5alsay 5alsay she'3lesh oo lata26iin nasaye7! feday nafcsh!" Marwa commanded

"keeeefsh!" Nahed sounded sad

.. 5 minutes later ..

"tabien 7ab?!" Marwa knew that she hurted Nahed; so she was trying to apologize -her way- since Nahed was her ONLY friend!

"LA2!" Nahed was still pissed

"yalla 3ad, tadrin mu gasdee oo ana lama a3aseb age6 7achy m3afin nafs Bu A7mad!" They both laughed as Marwa headed to Nahed and gave her some nuts

...Back to Me...

"Momken adesh?!" standing at Saja's door

"YAH! a7lan wa sahlan; el maktab maktbsh!" said Saja with her lightening smile!

"thanks.. maleit oo ana ga3da ma 2asawee chay!" I complained

"3ady; awal yoom dayman chethy, mudersh '6ary 3adel?! weinah"

"ee ohwa mudery oo 6ale3 2ejaza, yerja3 el esboo3 el yay"

"Loo ohwa hny chan ma 3tegsh! ymoot 3al sh'3el oo wayed daqiq!" she paused "bs la7tha.. Marwa aw Nahed ma3a6oosh chay tsaweeina?!"

"LA2!" i seemed pissed Saja laughed, i guess she understood my pissed face!

"etha hatha wayhesh 3ayal akeed kalamtay wa7da feehoum"

"Ambieh wayed embayin eny ma3asba?! Marwa!!" I said

"Ma aloomsh! bs 6af , hathy feha marath nafsy ma3enha 26 oo mara metzawja bs 3agelha 3agel wa7da 3umerha 14!"

"se2altny cham 3umry oo galt .." i paused.. i dont want to be the GOSSIP GIRL in the department!

"shegalat?!" Saja asked cuoriously

"madry .. 6af ma aby afaker bel mawthoo3, shega3da tsaween?!" changing the subject

"a7eb elly y'3ayer el mawthoo3!" smiled and continued "ga3da asawee taqrir.. shraysh teft7in el computer el thany oo a36esh cham document 3ashan tsawin taqrer?!"
"Taqrer sejy!!" I was thrilled!

"laa2 ya 7elwa! meswada , chay tedaribeen 3alih... ana msawyeta mn gabel , oo lama t5alsena nqaren bein el athnin; shraysh?!"

"7ady mwafqa! a7san mn el ga3da el ba6aliya!" I was exsited

She gave me some documents as i turn on the computer and started working or creating the report; too many numbers -something i adore!- and analysis. Dont worry i wont share the details with you as i know how much people love numbers :P

And time flew with Saja and the report i did; it was time to leave so i excused my self, went to my office, grabbed my bag and said a COLD "goodbye" to Marwa and Nahed. Got into my car and left with nice and strange memories of my first day at work.

Later that day

"shtaabiin!" i said in a sleepy voice
"goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooomaaaaaaaaaaaaay!" Maryoom destroyed what is left of my hearing abilities!
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!! NA3AM NA3AM!!! ABY ANAM!" i screamed
"maku noom! ana daga 3alesh 3ashan tgulin bnam! aby a3arf shloun awal yoom dawam?!"
"ufffff!!! tekfeen bs agoom agulsh" begging her :(
"3ady askra, bs nomtsh 5tarbat" Maryoom said in a devilsh tone
"Allahouma 6awelsh ya roo7! na3am?! kany gemt shtabiin??"
"shloun awal youm dawam?!"
"3ady, film, malal, wanasa" i knew giving her bits and pieces would drive her nuts
"SHENU YA3NEE!!! betgolin aw barga3 el 5a6 bwayhish oo ma akalmsh marah thanya b7ayaty!!" she was pissed -- mission accomplished ;)

i laughed at what she said! "a3sabsh!" laughing "hathy el 3anaween bs; al7in agulsh el tafseel el mumel"

i told her about the HANEM man, the 20 mintues search for the "shenqo", how it looked, Saja, rude Marwa, silent Nahed, Bu A7mad & my anonymous boss...

"kareha Marwa!" that was the first thing Maryoom said after i finished

"ee 7adha! bs 6af achwa ena Saja mawjoda chan ma adry sh9ar feny!!"

"ee zain,, agul"

"shtabiin?"

"meta 3zomat el dawam?? FRIDAYS 6ab3an!"
"waaaay bedina 6rarah! oo mn galsh ba3zmsh 3ala FRIDAYS?! shawrma el jam3iya oo t5ub 3alsh!!!" i burst from laughing

"a3almsh !! HAYEEN!!! degay 3alay oo goolay ba6la3 ma3ash!" maryoom said
"gemna mante7amal jokes!? ya 3umry entay maly '3ersh, bs a6afrsh! awal ma yanzel el ma3ash nroo7 FRIDAYS; ba3ad aaamray"

"ma yamer 3alsh 3ado.. enzain yalla gelbay wayhsh oo ma3 el salama!"
"bye ya bgara!" i teased and hang up before she would say a word

I looked at the clock; it was 5PM
Saturday... always long and boring, even when you have something to do! The beginning of the week is ... loooong!
Someone I miss for sure ... A7mad! I haven't talked to him since yesterday

**Dialing @*$ ** "haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa?!" obviously he just woke up!
"masa2 el 5eir" me trying to be nice!
"masa2 el ward wel joury"
"sa7 el noom! ma re7t el dawam?!"

let me explain something about A7mad; he works in his Dad's company, but he never goes to work unless his Dad asks him to! You know the type they call "ba6alah muqana3a"?! Well, my A7mad is one of them!

"la2; ams knt ta3ban mn el challieh oo nemt ... wensh?!"

"home"

"shloun el dawam?!"

"zain .. 6umasha oo eshwaya enqatheet, but overall i liked the first day"

"and why is that?!"

"i met this girl at work, she approached, very sweet and helpful and she made my day go as smooth as possible"

"Ashwa enha WA7DA mu WA7ED! adree meletsh wese3a!!"

"waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay shtabeeeeeeeeeeeeee?! ya3nee shfeha etha el wa7da kan 3endaha male friends or colliques?!"

"feha oo feha oo feha! ana ma artha! wein ga3din?!"

"ga3din in Kuwait! oo ba3din enta tsulifly 3an bnat 5altik oo 3amtik bs ana ma agul chay!"

"ya3nee lazem athakresh ana rayal?! ana 7aa6 7ad 7aghoum kelhoum, and they all know that i have someone in my life who took over my entire life" flirting!

"enta baya3 7achy! aslan why am i discussing this?! i know it is a deadend!"

"sha6ra shoshty!" SHOSHTY! kel youm dala3 yedid!!

"adry ... ta3al, mno hathy elly took over your life?!"

"ya3nee matadreen!"

"la2 ma adry" trying to be ... Daloo3a

"entay ya ba3ad ahaly oo 6owayfy!" he said

i blushed and flashed him a MWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

"ba3ad dinyeety entay!"

"adry!" sounding so confident

"enzain mageltely shesem ur new collique?!"

"LEISH ENSHALLAH?!" i was annoyed

"ymkn akalemha mn warash!" teasing me

"A7MEDOOOO! WAY3A" i yelled!!

"bser3a yengas 3alish! tawny made7 meno!? OMY??? i want to know" he nagged

i knew urging wont do me any good, and he will get what he wants eventually so "malgoof 6ool 3umrek! Saja Al XX"

and suddenly he screamed and said "NAAAAAAAAAAA3AAAAAAAAAAAAAAM?!"

What happened?! what's wrong with him?! who is Saja to make him go CRAZY?!

--------------------------------------------------------------

To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

--------------------------------------------------------------

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 4

2009-07-24T18:11:00.000-07:00

KNOCK KNOCK

"Na3am"

"coffee madam .. "

"okay, 7u6a hny... Bu A7mad ma ya ?!"

the Tea boy put one coffee cup on Saja's desk, the other one on a table next to me as he said "La madam ana mayshuf"

"okay .. mashkur"

the tea boy left the room as we sipped our coffee

"shrayesh bel qahwa 3awash?!"

"laa ba'as!" i said as i was enjoying my coffee ...

time passed quickly with Saja, she was very friendly! Coffee, sweet and we both talked about different things in life; makeup, fashion, society, work ... etc

almost 2 hours later; her phone rang

"Alo na3am? La! okay al7in neyee" she hang up

and just before i say any word Saja said "Bu A7mad sharaf.. lets go"

Ooh Bu A7mad?! why is the name A7mad hunting me?!?!?!?

we left her office, walked through the narrow corridor til its end, where Bu A7mad's office was at the end of the corner.

It was 10 AM when we entred Bu A7mad's office ...

"Ahalan ahlan!" his deep sharp voice said as he was welcoming us

"Hala feek; sej mudeer!" Saja commented

"Waaleeeeeeeeeeeeein ! ta7sedoun el faqer 3ala mutat el yem3a?! lu tadrin ana leish te2a5art.."

she interrupted "OO ana shakoo?! hathy bnyatna el yedida ya Bu A7mad, deer balik 3aliha oo lat yaninha methlna!"

"W shlunha?!"

"shegradiya oo sha6ra!"

i blushed

"eeeh .. yeebayin taly ,, entay 3aysha Al XX 3adel?!"

"ee 3adel"

"aku ba3ad 5 bnat oo shabiin baqbulin bel hay2a ... bs madry etha byeebun a7ad 3endna" He wondered

"ana asta2then, 3aysha bs t5alsin mn 2ustah 7amam ta3alay 3ndy" she gave me a winck as she excused her self

Bo A7mad started talking about the Hay2a in general and our department, i was listening carefully and studying his face expression...

Bo A7mad is almost 50, too many wrinkles and smokes heavily! Thick black mustache which obviously he colors it. He is married from two women and has 7 children total from both.

He wanted to walk around, show me the department and meet my team ..

As we were walking out, i checked his figure.. He is short, not a dwarf but short comparing to men height...

We finally reached my office and met my team; there were 4 desks inside the office, two occupied with women in their mid 30's and the other two were empty.

Bu A7mad introduced me to them and showed me the desk I will using; he also told me that my Direct boss is on leave and will be back next week.

I sat on my desk that had a Computer with Windows '98; i turned it on to waste some time playing Soliter

20 minutes later; a soft -wayed daloo3- voice curiously asked "entay sham 3umrsh?!"

----------------------------------------------------------------

To Be Contincued ... A Woman Torned Apart

----------------------------------------------------------------

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 3

2009-07-20T18:10:00.000-07:00

I woke up at 5:40 AM, prayed and got ready for work. I wore a black trouser with a white shirt with black & red strippes. Red shoes & grabbed my Lious Vitton bag, applied my protection, blusher, mascara & a fine lipstick and my hair was simply down.
Head to kitchen and prepared a quick cheese sandwish and went out.

It was 6:30 AM

Ashwa eny 6ela3t gabel el za7ma , el hay2a 3al 5th ring road...

thinking to myself while driving to work, first day of work

You know ,, at the very first day of work you feel strange; a mixture of a funny exciting freaky feeling! Even the drive to your work place feels weired! it's like going down the stairs to meet the guy who is sitting in the Hall room to propose...

NA3AM!! 3awash !!!!!!!!!!!!! SHAAAAAAKOOOO !!!

crazy thoughts in my head...

I reached the building in Rabiya approching the main entrance where Secuirty office was located...

"Saba7 el 5eir"

"Saba7 el noor ya Hanem"

"Ana muwathafa ydida, mumkn etdaliny wein qesm el mu7asaba?!"

"7adr bs 3awez el be6a2a el madaniya ya Hanem"

OO BA3DIN 3AL HANIM! I DONT LOOK THAT OLD!

"Leish?!"

"3ashan asagel el esm ya Hanem"

grabing my wallet from the bag, taking out the civil ID and giving it to the Eygptian guy..

After writing my name "etfadaly ya Hanem"

OK THAT WAS IT!

"mashkur oo ana mu HANEM! wein el edara?!"

"Oltely el mu7saba?!" looking shocked

"EE!" how long is this going to take?!

"te6la3y du'3ry , ymin ba3din du'3ry le'3ayet matla2ee yaf6a maktub 3aliha (edarat el hay2a) wetshufy ba2a el mu7asba fein"

"shkran!" pulled the window up and drove away!

it was 7 am when i reached the building,, and reached the Accounting Department at 7:20AM! I was looking for it for 20 minutes!

The Department wasn't in a luxurious building, nor a place you concider an office, it was a SHABRA, SHENKO, MUL7AQ!!! Name it whatever you want, but it is not an OFFICE BUILDING!!!

i managed to find a parking, went inside the (shenko) where another Eygptian secuirty guy was sitting behind a desk on it a big book , i assumed it was the ATTENDENCE SHEET.

He looked at me in a strange way, not a dirty look, but a shocked one!

"Esalam 3alikom"

"Wa3alky3om el salam 2umury"

achwa no "HANEM"

"Ana muwathafa yedida oo el youm awal youm dawam.."

"AA ok fehemt, sagely esmik hena law sama7ty" flipping the page of the book and pointing on a sheet that says (Al Ta3yiin El Jadiid)

Pulled a pen from my bag and wrote my name.. He was still shocked

"Al7in wein aru7?"

"tru7y shemal, du'3ery fee maktab ABU A7MAD, howa yelolik ta3mly eeh" he quickly said "bs howa msh mawgood, yeegee kaman shewaya"

"ya3nee eshkether shewaya?"

"ya3ny nus sa3a keda"

Allahouma 6awelsh Ya Rou7!

"Al7in ana wein aru7??" i sounded annoyed

"estany henak bel karasy oo bs yegy 3ashan ywaqa3 7udur, 2ashawerloo 3aliky"

He seemed nice

I went and sat on the chairs where he pointed, they were facing the entrance door. The "shenqo" was dull and gloomy! I dont know how it is called (Hay2at el Zera3a) and there is not a single plant in this department!

The offices were cubes, as i suppose, some on the right hand, others on the left. It was a small department but there was an extention to other departments.

15 minutes passed as the employees started to come; some gave me a GAZE as if i was a UFO or something, others passed without a single look. They were mainly old women -not too old- and men.

Now i know why the secuirty guy was starring at me with a shocked look!

Everyone looked the same except one! a late 20's lady came in the "shenqo" wearing a dark purple knee length dress printed with big black flowers with a jeans jacket. Her hair was a up with a slik pony; bright blusher and lipstick; she was wearing black tights and black heels.

Everyone else -i mean women- wore 3abaya, or long skirt with long shirt. Or something undescribable!

When she entred, she gave me a (checking you out) look with a smile, she signed the sheet and talked to the egyptian guy almost wispearing .. i wonder!

Saja & the Egyptian guy

"hathy meno?"

"dee muwazafa gdeda, gaat mn el sa3a 7:30!"

"mbayin 3aliha sha6ra; na6ra el athwal?"

"Aiywa ya set Saga"

"Saga b3ink! SAJA.. el muhem, ana ba5eth-ha makteby; leei ya el athwal, deg 3ala makteby oo ana awadiha 3enda"

"7ader"

...

"Saba7 el 5eir"

"Saba7 el noor"

"Ana Saja, mudaqiq awal.. shesmsh?"

"3aysha, ana muwathafa yedida"

"na6ra Bu A7mad?!"

"EE.."

"hatha ymkn eyee esa3a 10! ta3alay makteby a7san mn ga3dtsh hny.. neshrab coffee ma3 ba3ath" she kindly suggested

"MMM okay" i smiled, grabbed my bag and went to her office

As we entre her office, there were two desks. one too tidy as it never been touched! The other was full of life! Picture frames, small flower vase, colored books and stick notes, a huge computer screen! behind the desk was a window.

"tefathelay" pointing at the chair infront of the colorful desk

"mashkura,, hatha maktebsh?!" i asked

"EE .. mu mbayen?"

"Emballah.. mashallah full of life!"

"it should! 3ayal shlun awanes 3umry bhal magbara?!"

i lauhged and said "EE Wallah magbara!!"

She smiled and asked "qahwetsh sada or 7elwa?"

"wasa6"

dailed on the desk phone and said "Salam, jeeb athnin qahwa wasa6 maktab Saja" and hanged the phone

"Ee 3aysha.. mn wein met5arja?"

"Jam3at el Kuwait, koliyat el tijara"

"3diliya 3adel?!"

"ee.. oo entay?!"

"Allah ysalmsh ana 5erajt jam3at 3ien Shams fee Maser, ta5asus mu7saba.. oo sarly hny 4 years awal mate5arajt oo qadamt fee diwan el 5edma, qbaluny hny.. Oo bs" then she asked "entay shyabish hny?"

"diwan el 5idma, bs twaqa3t ena el mukan arqa mn chethy! el mabna wayed ... mu mabna!!"

She laughed loudly and said "Arqa!! ya 7elwsh ya 3awash!! tara el hay2a mn el amaken el dathra fel dera!"

"Sej" i sounded disappointed

"Sejien! bs tebqa a7san mn '3erha, cham 3umrsh?"

"25 .. "

"Katkoota! shaklish 20! Ana 28; shufay ana erte7tlsh awal masheftsh la2eny 7asetna methel ba3ath.. Etha la7athtay el 3umom hny ya 3abat oo 7jab 3ady bs kelhum foog el 35! entay metzawja?!"

"La2 .. "

"Ana ba3ad .. ehny el a'3labiya 7arem oo omahat 3yal, 7leeweein bs mayen3a6un wayeh kelsh! Entay thkarteny bnafsy awal madawmt, nafs el ga3da and the look! adry ana mu wayed akbar mnsh bs hal mukan y5aleesh tekbreen 10 snin"

she kept talking as i was listening carfully

"Ma7ad galy shasawee aw shlun atsaraf, 5asa eny 3esht 5 snin fee Masr oo makent ayee el Deira ella manedar, fa wayed sadefatny mawaqef tsaraft feha '3ala6 oo 6e7t fee mishakel .. ma abeesh e6e7in fee aghla6y , madry leish bs e3tabriny methel e5tsh el kbira" she said with a caring tone

i just nodded

KNOCK KNOCK

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To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

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P.S.

Senser apologize for the delay; it was a long week. But i promise a quicker post

Mie Mie

A Woman Torn Apart -- 2

2009-07-18T18:09:00.000-07:00

"la7tha!" i suddenly said looking at the phone

IT WAS ...

"SHFEESH??!!" Maryoum was worried!

"Brd 3ala el telefon.. hatha .."

"ashufsh e3tefastay! okay yallah an6ersh" she knew it was my .. A7MAD

"ee bser3a 6el3ay bara!!" i begged her!

"NA3AM!" shocked

"Yallah please!" pushing her gently out of the room!

"Maynouna!!!! WALLAH EL 3ATHEEM MAYNOOOONA!" she yalled and slammed the door!

the phone kept ringing,

i slamed the door and ...

"alo" i said softly

"SA3A TREDIN!! WENSH?!" he yalled

"a3sabik! el youm yam3atna oo knt ta7t!" of course i lied! i forgot to tell him im going out!

"ee ,, shloun el yam3a??" 6a5 shwaya

"boring! so qararna ana oo Maryoum nru7 ntsawag" giving him bits and peices!

"leish shopping?! wein enshallah?! oo meta bte6l3un?! oo mnu raye7 m3akoum?!" pouring all the possible questions you can imagine! Typical A7mad!

"WAAAY la7tha! benru7 sharq, bs ana oo Maryoum oo bne6la3 al7in la2an aby ashtrey hdoum ydidy my new job!!" I intended to keep the "when" part in the middle

"NA3AM?!" with a scary tone!

"Allah yn3am 3alik" stupidly replying

"SHENU A5ER CHAY GELTY?!"

"bashtry hdoum yed..."

"LA YA MAMA MU HATHA! META BTAMSHOUN?!"

"al7in"

"ENSHALLHA MTA KNTAY NAWYA TGULIN??? BACHR! YA3NEE ANA ETHA MADAGEIT CHAN MAGELTAY!" UFF chena 3ayouz tet7al6am! but with a scary tone!

"ya 3umry enta! ana agdar asawy chethy! e7na bn6la3 bhdoumna, ana knt labsa jeans oo t-shirt oo sha3ry msashwar oo ehya yat labsa hdoum 6al3a.. So i asked her if she can come with me shopping, bs 6ela3t dary ayeeb jan6ity oo knt badg 3alik bs enta sebagtny" then i flirted "shft shloun galbk 3ala galby?!"

"ana b6awefha hal mara.. bs ya 3awoosh etha sawiteha mara thanya batelsh mn gmtsh oo al3an 5ayrsh! SEMA3TAY?!"

"7ather!! ay awamer thanya?!" trying to control my rising temper!

"la2!! bs tuslein 6amniny"

"akeed 7abiby .. shloun el chalieh?"

"zain .. tawny ga3ed oo al7in bashufly chay akla" Just woke up and has the energy to fight! Maynon!

"bel 3afya 7abiby"

"y3afish ya rou7 7abibsh" i know! he suddenly switchs his mood!

"enzain ana lazem arou7 3ashan ma net2a5ar, tadry ana baredha beit-houm 3gub"

"okay yalla take care OO.."

"a6amnk lama oosal"

"sha6ra!"

"adry!! bye"

.... Yes he hangs up without saying bye!

I opened the door of my room and there was Maryoum waiting for me -- taksr el 5a6er!

"SA3A!!"

"emshay bs wely y5aleesh kafy ohwa!"

"ana madry shloun met7amlita 5 snin! maynooon!"

"ma7ad maynoon ela maryoum! latguleen 3ana chethy!" going down the stairs

"UFF enzain!"

When we walked in the hall room, some women were taking a nap, some were watching TV. My mom was drinking her tea with Om Maryoum...

"wein enshallah?" she said in a low voice

"baru7 ashtery hdoum 7ag bachr"

"mu tet2a5reen!"

"ee adry, bawasel Maryoum el beit oo bard mbachr 3ashan ga3dat bachr" coming closer to her

"enzain,, tabin chay?!"

"entay kareema oo ana astahel" approaching her and kissed her forehead

"bnt Obosh!!!" grabbing her wallet from her bag and giving me 20 KD "Hash! ykafy?!"

I looked at the 20 KD shocked and said "Yoma Allah yhadash 20 dinar! ana ray7a ashtery HDOUM mu blousa!"

"fesag fesag!" complaining "e5thay kart el bank oo se7bay 100 dinar, enzain?"

"Allah y5alesh lee ya a7la om!!" took her card, said bye and went out

>> Conversation between my mom and Maryoum's mom

"mayser chethy ya om S3oud! Tet3alam el fesag ba3dein!" Om Maryoum said

"Weeeih! 5aleha testans! hathy je3dity oo tawha el fqayra tetwathaf! Yseir edawem bhdoum qadeema?! Shtabin el awadim yangdoun 3aliha!!" Mom defended me!

"Madry bs 100 wayed! sheftay bnty Maryoum ma ba6elat 7aljha!" saying with pride!

"tadry ena omha je3sa!" Mom replied sarcasticly!

"ANA Je3sa! al7in elly y3alim 3yala el tawfer yseer je3s?! Ma haget-ha mnsh Ya Muthy!!" Om Maryoum said madly

"7abibty ya Lulwah! at'3ashmar weyash! tadrin ana a7eb a6afer refejty oo murt O5oy Allah yer7ema" Mom said trying to calm her down

"Allah yer7ema,, magdar 3alsh! 6ool 3umrsh jumbazeya oo 3ayarah!"

"Mashkoura Ya refejty .. yseir nethana bel shahee?!"

"EE yseir!"

>> Back to me

We drove from Rutha to Sharq crossing share3 el Hub - i dont know why they call it that name! to the Gulf road, then finally arrived and parked in Sharq at 5:30.

I shopped 'til i dropped! Maryoum was complaining all the time from the long shopping ;p

After 2 hours of shopping , a plain red long sleves, mid-length dress cought my eyes from the men-side window in ZARA ... i had to get it!

As we entred the store, a tall, dark hair and sun-kissed tone looked at us and kept staring at us with his eyes!

We ignored him and went directly to the dresses section, searched for my size and went to fitting room.

"Shrayesh?!" i asked Maryoum

"Eyanin Shosha! bs mu 7ag el dawam sa7?!"

"La2 6ab3an! 7agy" i wincked at her

"Masboub sab! mumkn ta5theena oo ne6la3?! ye3t!!"

"Okay yal 7ana!"

I took it off and went out of the fitting room to the cashier to buy it. To my surprise, the sun-kissed guy was near by the cashier, holding 2 t-shirts and when he saw us, he immidiatly came to our cashier and stood right next to us!

Maryoum whispered "hatha leish mu rathy ynazel 3youna, 5ebel?!"

The word "5ebel" cracked me up but i didnt laugh loudly!

"Leish teth7kin?! al7in 7sbala 3ana!"

"leish e7na 3an meno ne7esh?! mu 3ana?!" i whispered back, trying to hold my laugh!

"UFF!" she said madly!

When we finally reached our turn, paid and went out of the store to Starboucs. He followed us without a word.

Took our Frabs and Maryoum el faj3ana got a Turkey Sandwish. Headed to my car and he was still behind us! i hate it when a guy sticks to you like a super glue!

"Hatha shyabee!!" complained Maryoum while walking to my car

"Madry! bs ana ra7 arawy etha gal kelma wa7da!" I said angerily

"aslan ohwa meno yabee!!??" Maryoum asked

"Wana shdareny?! 3ajbsh! Yallah get in the car oo wla kelma!" I commanded!

As we were ridding the car, he came my side and said "Mumkn ak.."

I intruppted "MUMKN SHENU?! TSEIR QALIL ADAB?! LAW SAMA7T WA5ER OO BALA 7ARAKAT YAHAL" pulling my door as he step aside

"ana mu helgy bs 3a6eny forsa!" he said

I closed my door, put the gear on R and drove away

I looked at upper mirror and He was still standing with the weirdest smile ever!

"Wallah oo gayem 7athesh ma3 hal blousa!" Maryoum sarcastily said

"Shut up! 3al aqal mazyoun"

"AAAAH kan 3ajbsh! bagoul 7ag a7mad!" laughing!

"HAHAHA, again SHUT UP! ana gelt mazyoun, ma gelt 3ajebny.. aku farg! ba3din entay tadrin salfat safatny oo raqamny ma7ebha!"

"ee rag3ay! 3aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaajbesh!" teasing me!!

"WAAAY! ee 3ajebny oo lu maknt ma3 a7mad chan kalamta! 3ajbsh chthy?!" I yalled

"ee! el e3teraf bel 7aq fathela"

"chub"

It was 8:30pm when i reached Kifan to drop Maryoum at her place - she must be home maximum 9pm

"Nezlay" she said while i parked at the front gate

"La maly 5elg Omsh elly wayed t7ebny" I sarcastly said

"Ya shensh! entay shaku feha?!"

"Al7in wagta!? aslan lazem ared el beit! Waray shower oo 3asha oo dawam oo A7MAD 3ashan laydeg 9:30 oo ysare5 "3AWASH WEINSH"!! immitating his scary voice

Maryoum laughed and said "kefsh yal 5abla! oo bachr degay 3alay mn dawamsh aby a3arf el wath3"

"akeed ya 6alebat el jam3a" teasing her!

"Waliin ya 3ayouz! tara kelhoum 4 snin!!" she said while getting out of the car "bye!" and closed the door

I waved at her and drove home

>> My room

Choose what I will wear for tomorrow, a black trouser and a white shirt with thin black and red strips, gave them to Teresa -our servent- to iron and went back to my room.

Wore my pijama, set my alarm at 6:00am, dipped in bed & called A7mad

"Alo"

"hala bhal sout"

"hala feik, wenk?" softly asked

"7ader el beit .. shloun el soug?!"

"Zain ,, ba3din asuliflik! al7in aby anam!! Tadry 7abibtk muwathfa al7in"

"Eg3aad! 7ather ya muwathfa! excited?!"

"Excited that i will finally work; but not to the place! You know i always wanted KOC" i said disappointed

"EE ya 3umry adry, bs el dawam a7san mn ga3dat el beit" comforting me

"3al gultk... bs tusal dzely msg 6ameny, ana bnam al7in.. tesba7 3ala 5eir"

"7aaf?!" he asked devilishly

"masadeg! ana mu ams mkalmtik oo lel7in nafs el 2ustwana"

"daam tadrein leish el este3bat! good night kiss bser3a!"

MMMMMWAAAAH!

"ya galby oo denyety! good night 7abibty"

"good night ,, mu ten..."

He hanged the phone! UFF i hate him when he does that!

Sent: "mu tensa msg e6amny lama tusal el beit"

Inbox: "7ather 7abibty"

I closed my eyes ...

Thought about tomorrow, about the place, the people..

I asked myself "will i fit in?! will they like me?! is it another jobless government job?! is it better than KOC..."

then suddenly!

He falshed in my mind!

His face

His eyes

His voice

the sun-kissed guy! Why is your picture flashing in my closed eyes?!?

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To Be Continued ... A Woman Torn Apart

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Mie Mie